i wanna get things off my chest
its currently 3:33 and i woke up like thirty minutes ago. I feel horrible, my mind is racing and i can't even let myself calm down because i don't know how. I find it so difficult typing this in, my mind is so chaotic rn i can barely focus. It's really difficult for me to talk about this to my close ones bc i am afraid of being judged and considered an attention seeker. My partner is the only one i trust and that can help me but i feel like he isn't even trying. He tells me "there's no point in getting upset" or something of the sort and so i've given up on even trying to make him understand. My best friend absolutely abandoned me for her bf (her relationship w him is rly toxic).
i can't even continue writing this i am embarrassed . I feel like a coward . My mind is exploding i feel like this will never end
i am constantly researching new and new conditions in attempt of self diagnosis. Last time i diagnosed myself i ended up being correct.