insecurities, lack self confidence :/

I honestly wish it would be easy for me to be more sociable and make myself noticeable. I am in the process of trying to come out of my shell and socialise more, but whenever Im physically in a social event I signed myself up for, I can’t help but have a mini social anxiety attack, I couldn’t bring myself to step forward and start a conversation with a group of people. I want to grow as a person and feel more confident and make friends easily but it’s hard it’s really hard for me and I’m just lost in this process. My friends has been telling me about my bad posture and I do not really put much effort in making myself look presentable which I admit. I just wish I have the guts to make a big change for myself, to grow as a person, to come out of my comfort zone and eventually be the person I want to be. I wish I know how to deal with my inner conflicts and grow as a person. I just don’t know how and what to do, and how to drive myself to actually take action instead of just having the thought of progressing and growing. Anyways, thanks for reading :))