broken lens (poetry)

the lens is broken.

it shows a blur of warning,

urgent, alarming:

we have burned here

and we have bled;

so many of us have been dashed upon the rocks here

that we built a tower to shine red

far far out into the sea.

and so i feel my skin tighten,

urging me to keep it safe,

to preserve what exists.

and yet –

the lens is broken.

what seems marked by destruction

may be poised to create in me

something fresh and beating.

the risk, the risk;

i must be willing to take it

if i am ever to get

where im going.

~~~

I've just started understanding my anxiety in the last year, even though it's been a part of me for a very long time. It kind of hid underneath my other emotions, so I thought of myself as just being lazy. I had to start naming the fears I had before pushing back on them. Something that has been helpful is trying to understand anxiety through metaphor. I wrote this poem as a reminder that I can feel like something bad is going to happen without cause, and to encourage myself to question that feeling. If you liked this poem, you can find more at my website.

Thanks for listening! I hope you find something to make you smile today. You're all wonderful.