Work Life, Functioning, and Anxiety
Hello All, I wasn't sure if I should post this here or somewhere else (like a trauma forum), but all the same I'd like to seek your insight/support--it would really be appreciated. So, growing up, my self-esteem was frequently cut down by the parent who raised me. That's another issue in itself. Being an adult, I thought I had gotten over the effects of this and have thankfully embraced my self worth for some time. However, I have noticed that my work life is being affected dramatically. I haven't been in the workforce very long (2 years since graduating college), but with every job process, from the search to actually being in the position for a time, it's always met with extreme anxiety. I'm talking crying, near breakdowns, etc. I've discovered I can't work in an office, as the environment is too stressful/triggering. I'm doing direct work with clients now, but not making enough to be independent. Now I'm trying to find additional part-time work, or possibly switch again after less than a year at my current job, and I'm again panicking, having near breakdowns with the process. My fears are associated with not being able to hold better jobs, never being financially independent, never being smart or competent enough to hold a job. I fear it won't ever get better. I know that if I continue thinking like this it will never help me. But I can't shake what I believe about myself. I have no idea how to escape from this. I press on, because I know I have to. If you guys have any idea how to handle this, or have anything else, please feel free to share. Thanks for reading <3