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Rough time...

AyeAna October 30th, 2019
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I dont even know where to began...my 1st time venting on here & want to thank anyone that reads my post. Past 4 years have been the hardest years of my life. 2016 was sick the whole year with sinus infection got surgery and felt better did get a scare because they thought I had cancer. 2017 had a hormone imbalance had bad acne and weight gain which I was strong through. I lost the weight and joined the gym was so proud! And the acne I got help after I found a naturopath.. since I went to 8 doctors and none of them helped they had even scared me it was PCOS and it turns out I dont even have that. With the scare. I stated to lose my hair and it was horrible (still have hair shedding) and it took a toll on my self esteem. 2018 I lost my grandma just 5 days before my birthday and my ex boyfriend also broke up with me (5 year relationship) he was the love of my life and my best friend and crushed me into pieces. But I got through 2018 how? I dont know but I did... 2019 my ex came back into my life and I was super happy he told me the sweetest things and I felt like finally I had that guy I met. And BAM! He hurt me again! Dropped me like Im nothing... and that hurt me I went through an emotional shock. And it caused me to have panic attacks it was the worse... I managed to stop the panic attacks but still trying to cope with my anxiety symptoms and its hard... especially when Im going through depression because of everything Ive gone through. Ive tried 4 antidepressants and none worked... last night I gave one of the pills another shot and it made me feel so much worse this morning and didnt sleep much. So I decided to vent.. sometimes Im afraid I will never feel normal again. It hurts me that the person I loved with all my heart didnt care and gave me such a shock in my heart. Im trying to be strong... and battling everyday! 💛

4
mary31 October 31st, 2019
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@AyeAna

hey you are so strong. You should be super, super proud of yourself. And you know what, if you are going through so many things, you can believe that life is going to give you a nice time for a while. Make goals for yourself, for your health, for your hobbies, make things that make you happy. Keep looking for help to your problems, you seem to be truly open for that and this is really good. You deserve to be happy, look for it on the little things. Wish you the best!

AyeAna OP October 31st, 2019
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@mary31

Thank you so much Mary 💛 Im trying to be as strong as I can be. Thank you for your advice Im going to try that out because sometimes I feel like I let my days pass and dont focus on little goals. Trust me I was a person that use to hold everything in. Ever since I was a kid. And I noticed that doesnt help me. So now its my time to focus on me and get healthy again. Mentally, emotionally & physically. I appreciate your support means a lot to me! Brings my heart comfort!

sparklesinthewater October 31st, 2019
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@AyeAna

There is nothing like a broken heart to wreak havok in our souls...and your heart got broken right when you went through so many torments...like the saying goes, "when it rains, it pours" and no bad thing comes alone...I know it...I went through hair loss too due to chemo or at other times like now due to emotional stress but somehowI always get it back😊, for now😶 at least.

There is no cure for broken heart but time, in my case not even time😉😊, so I am sorry that now you have got to run this emotional gauntlet and nothing makes sense at all...ssuch is life, playing with us...if it helpes you have my hugs🤗🤗🤗 and am by your side knowing what goes inside your soul...😔😔😔

AyeAna OP November 2nd, 2019
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@sparklesinthewater

You are very right! When it rains it defiantly pours! You are amazing your message brought me so much comfort & just like that feeling that everything will be okay. Thank you for your hugs 🤗🤗🤗🤗 I really needed that! And Im glad having someone one who understands what I feel & im going through! 💛 Thank you for taking your time to write me.

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