Never Ending Intrusive Thoughts

I feel overwhelmed as well and think I can’t see a therapist or afford one and even if I did it wouldn’t work because these days miscommunication and egotistical moments are everywhere so I’m not sure what to do or what helps because I’ve been working on this for 20 years and I’m still struggling with communication, poverty and homelessness.

Some things I have tried is:

The Work by Byron Katie via retreat and workshop

Affirmations ala Louise Hay

Guided Visualizations

Vipassana Meditation

Walks (to the trash, out the front door to the back, wandering)

Deep breathing (six counts in, hold for six, six counts out)

Eating mindfully

Keeping my phone out of my bedroom

DBT and CBT skills

Writing (poetry, short stories, novels, journaling)

Reframing (write down a thought, then the opposite)

Budgeting

Decluttering

Reading

Studying

Making friends with cats

Drinking enough water

5 Minute Journal by Intelligent Change

Telling myself “I love you” in the mirror

Saying “well done” in the mirror when I manifest good

Saying“I love you anyway” in the mirror when I manifest bad

Simplifying

Having bubble baths with epsom salt

Drinking tea mindfully

Thinking good things about others

Sending love and peace into the world

Doing a project (don’t let great stop you from doing good)

Picking up garbage

Writing or thinking of things I’m grateful for

Tidying

Enjoying beauty (sunset, the stripes in a cats’ tail, nice homes)

Doing something kind and random for someone else or myself

Doing my nails (trim, file, maybe paint)

Thinking of good things I’d like to do or that exist

Planning a vacation (even if I don’t take it)

Imagining myself moving, living, being in an island of safety

Imagining everyone in my life as safe, successful, supported

Practicing saying ‘OUT!’ to thoughts I don’t want

Putting my worries in a cloud or balloon then watching it float off

Buying myself flowers or chocolates - going on mini dates

Free Exposure Therapy via The Strongest Families Institute

Free listener training via 7 cups

Calling helplines, crisis lines and suicide lines

Keeping in touch with my family

Laying out my clothes the night before

Separating my weaknesses and strengths from that of others

Allowing others to help me without taking advantage of me

Letting go of the past so it doesn’t eat me alive

Playing games on my phone

Not trying so hard

@Jade9690

Hi Jade!

I personally confront myself, talk to myself (not aloud) telling that there will be a time for dealing with that, that I can trust I will find the best way to do it, that now is not the time to plan and prepare in detail for that future or eventual thing, but to focus on the issue in front of me here and now.

I try to bring my focus back to the present, a thousand times if necessary. I take it as permanent training. For me, it's ok to get lost, then get back, get back and get back a zillion times.

I also write down the things I should plan, prepare for or worry me, and try to write concrete actions to deal with each.

Writing down these things in a place (notebook, PC, phone, whatever) that I revisit often, that I trust I will be aware of and will have at hand all the time, helps me "download" the bouncing, recurring thoughts off my mind. So the task becomes writing right now things down, not dealing now with them.

In the spirit of your question, these are things I actually do and work for me.

They are not professional therapy, nor do I claim can heal a generalized anxiety disorder.

Thank you for such a well-articulated, honest, relevant, and useful post!

@Jade9690 obsessive thoughts are with me a lot. I take medication, which doesn't always help

Obsessed with my obsessive thoughts I took medication then got obsessed with the medication I have been with them for 30 odd years nothing works when they overwhelm but mostly mine training works if anyone needs that please message me @JohnDoe70

@Jade9690 Hey Jade, you already know you are not able to control everything what's gonna happen or is happening at the moment... so why not focus on present moment and only on good, only on those things which you really CAN control?...

we can work on these things together here if you want. :)

@Jade9690 Hi, dear Jade!

I read your words and can relate as if they have been my own writing. I overthink so much to the point of feeling overwhelmed and about to burst and, instead of doing something about it (like, start my chores from the beginning), I do nothing and find refuge in sleeping way too much, to forget. When I do this, I think I will “reset” my system and feel better and energized again, which happens often, but not always.

Apart from my job and accumulating chores, and thinking too much about them instead of doing something to make any progress, I also “engage” in catastrophic fears. They are real and legitimate, I know. Besides, I have a somehow traumatic past regarding the thought of not being able to make ends meet. Money problems, heath issues, the notion of time flying and lost opportunities, life and youth ephemeral, the friends that I lost/ the ones I could have made… have always haunted me. Despite all, all these traumatic experiences happened, in that past, all in my head. Say, I suffered more from antecipation than from the actual events I feared that could have really happened - if you know what I mean.

Now, that I should be aware of these dynamics… I find myself overwhelmed with overthinking - all over again. And I suffer a lot.

Good news is, I’m getting better. Slowly but surely.

I once read some quote that said “focus on the step before your eyes and not on the whole staircase” - that’s so simple, however, so true. That frame of mind had helped me lots ever since, because it makes sense.

Plus: whether we want it or not, whether we give it a lot of thought or not, time passes… good moments will come along. And, most unfortunately, there will be not so good events as well. So, let’s do this the easier way: let ourselves go and accept the things we can’t change or are beyond our control. How? Focusing on that very step before your eyes, be it finishing some chore, some job, or simply focusing on the next thing you’re going to treat yourself with next.

My humble advice:

. Give fear the cold shoulder and do what needs to be done, anyway.

. Do your best, be it writing a final dissertation or mopping the kitchen floor.

. Acknowledge that you’re not perfect and are not expected to give more than you can/ have.

. Give yourself a brake, sometimes.

. Reward yourself often.

Some techniques to let go of unwanted thoughts:

. Clean the house/ wash your car;

. Watch TV or YouTube videos on superficial or “soft” themes.

. Try new hobbies.

. Exercise - this really helps, because, besides releasing endorphins (natural antidepressants), make you feel tired enough at night so you can fall asleep better.

. Sleep well and eat healthily.

. Plan things to do on the short run (going to the beach next weekend, shopping, the movies… whatever brings you pleasure).

. Chitchat a lot about not so profound matters (like the meaning of life and why things are the way they are…). If you don’t have friends, write those simple things down or come here, to 7 cups.

With this, I’m not saying that exercising introspection isn’t positive. On the contrary: that’s huge. Nevertheless, when it’s your well-being that is in question, set that aside, live a little, unconcerned, free.

Like Freddie Mercury would say about things beyond your control: “whatever happens, I leave it all to chance”. And, perhaps, very nice things are coming your way. Keep the faith and never lose hope, because God (or the universe, if you prefer) has mysterious ways. Trust Him.

♥️

One of my favorite books to read that helped me to feel calm and content with life is “Mindfullnes. A practical guide to find peace in a frantic world.” by Mark Williams and Danny Penman. I highly recommend reading this book as it helped me overcome my worries and everyday stress and anxiety.