Losing myself: Agoraphobic anxiety after bipolar depression relief.
I was recently treated for my bipolar depression through a treatment callled TMS (trans cranial magnetic stimulation) therapy.
after decades of trial and error, this treatment hekped rid me of my depression (for now), and it only took 4 months (with treatment everyday.)
but now that Im not as depressed, Ive found that my anxiety has skyrocketed to a debilitating degree. I thought my anxiety was a symptom when it was its own monster, and when my bipolar depression took a step back, my anxiety took the reigns.
since December Ive been having panic attacks almost daily, on bad days- multiple a day, and Ive become agoraphobic in my tendencies.
everything scared me, and Im constantly afraid of being alone and leaving the house Ill prepared or without my safe people. Im constantly feeling scared of not being able to handle the outside world.
and at its worst, I cant leave my bedroom. Especially if people are over at the house.
i feel like Im slowly losing myself and Im not sure what to do. I watch all these TEDTalks and motivational speeches to try and get myself going, but its all so exhausting.
in any case, think you for listening
@Krissydear I'm sorry friend. It must be incredibly frustrating to have one problem come in and replace another. I am in a similar situation in whih I need to keep a very balanced treatment for my depression and anxiety. It seems that if I focus too much on one, the other sneaks up on me and gets really bad. At the moment it seems that my best case scenario is to have both in my life but at manageable levels. Any effort to get rid of them makes it worse. I don't know why we seem to have this problem. I wish I had an answer for you but I don't.
I related so much to your post. Ive posted my own struggles on 7 cups and I have used many of the same phrases. I'm tired of trying so hard all the time. I get frustrated when I think I'm getting better and then it suddenly hits me that I'm worse. I understand you. I wish I could do more than simply validate that you aren't alone. I wish I could provide you answers on how to get better. If I ever figure out the secret to balancing anxiety and depression, I'll be sure to get back to you but I don't know if there is one out there.
Hang in there friend. We'll get through this together. How have you been since February? Has the depression stayed away with the new treatment? Has your anxiety gotten any better?
