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I Can't Do Anything Right
DenialTwist January 26th, 2021
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I can’t do anything right. I always say the wrong things, I can’t make any friends because I can’t fit in to any group or clique, I was always a background character in my previous friend groups. I draw, I love to draw. But when I show people they always put me down. I want to write but I can’t, I’m a mediocre cook. I can’t focus on anything anymore, not even fun things like music or books. Everything is "I can’t" and I’m so sick of it. I want to cry so, so bad. I just want this all to stop but I can’t. I tried therapy but I was too shy to talk to MY OWN THERAPIST. MY OWN THERAPIST! It was so embarrassing, my god. I don’t want to tell my mom because I’m afraid that she’ll throw me into a mental hospital. I don’t have any friends. I tried talking to listeners on 7cups but they’ve all been meh (no offense to listeners, of course) I can’t focus on my schoolwork but I want to be a vet and my mom's always talking about how important education is and I want to make her proud. But I can’t. She gave up so much for me and I give her mediocrity and I feel like a burden. I feel like a skid mark on my family’s name. I feel like a failure and I just might be one.

I don’t know what I want by posting this but I’m stuck. I’m stuck and I don’t know how to get out.

4
dragonball4lyfe January 26th, 2021
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Psst . Try crocheting. I suck at a lot of things well I did. I started watching videos on YouTube and tried and boom I did it! Also cooking ? What types of things do you like to cook or eat? I have some recipes easy because I’m cheap and well I don’t have a lot of time to cook because it’s usually whenever someone’s hungry i cook I have a time limit. I’m writing a cook book for my kiddos :)

DenialTwist OP January 26th, 2021
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@dragonball4lyfe

I mostly bake cakes and other sweets. I like to make soups too. To be honest, it's not the fact that I can't cook good that hurts me, it's seeing my mom have to fake interest in my baking/cooking that hurts.

dragonball4lyfe January 26th, 2021
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Meh don’t take it to heart. Cook for you not for her affection. I always wanted my moms but I’m 31 it’s time to move on. I have kids of my own and it’s evident I don’t know how to be emotional with them. I should hug them more I know I should but showing emotion is hard for me as it was beat out of me. I bake for the feeling I accomplished something great, I usually cook for my kids and husband or I make random things and it’s who ever wants it. I love cooking soups! Cabbage soup is amazing and I hate veggies lmao. I want to try like a cream of chicken with chicken breast in it and some potato chunks and bacon with cheese and mushrooms! Idk sounds good

DenialTwist OP January 26th, 2021
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@dragonball4lyfe

Thank you for this. I've been trying to convince myself to do what I like for me and not for others, it never sunk in. But, seeing someone else say this, it feels true.

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