Hi, please dont judge
Today was a crappy day for me. I keep missing my ex best friend. (i was in a dark place and said i didnt need him and that pushed him away.) i feel like crap all the time like its my fault he left me. i loved him alot. i get sad and mad at myself every time i think of him and it makes me wanna cry and scream. i start to get axiety thinking about him, because he had so many issues. (he wouldent eat for multiple days, SH, talking about ending his life.) i still miss him so much and i just want him back. ( i had feelings for him, but he started dating one of my other best friends, even tho she knew it hurt me. all i could really say was: "its fine, i dont care.) I have a boyfriend now, and im very happy with him, But i still want him back (as my best friend.) I still worry about him, even though he wont talk to me. we used to hug each other every day, but then i moved away and we drifted apart. i still feel so sad. i feel worthless about the whole thing. i feel like im stupid for missing him.
just a rant, lots of love,
Austin
@happydays447hi I just saw that my sister was on this site and she talking about very deep scary thing and I'm so worried now that's why I made an account pls can someone talk to me x
@User1234534 you can just try to talk with her, for example you can ask her how she feels? And after that you just start listening to her
@User1234534 you can go and try to talk to her and reach to her very gently and try to be as much understading with her as you can , i think she needs to be listened and she needs to talk about what she's going through but maybe she's scared cause most of the people are mainly here for this reason
It will get easyier over the feelings and you will miss him less and less.
@happydays447 i understang what you feel and i know thats its absolutly horribke , you just start to feel guilt and anger 24/7 and especially after being in a dark place when you are the one that don't understand your own self , even if he kept rejecting you maybe its time for you to try to move on , i know it hard but if some people that were in your situation were able to turn the page even in a hard way then you are , i suggest for you to send him a one more last message where you say everything you wanted to tell him , that u also were in a dark place which led you to be like that with him , and to do your goodbyes for good , then focus on youself for good but trust me you can do it you'll see by the time just keep your head up and if you need to talk to someone you can always hi me up even if im new to this app
@cyb1110 Thank you so much, the only thing is i dont have his number, as i got a new phone, and the only way i could contact him was through snapchat, but my mom wont let me have it anymore. but think yo so much for the advice, it means the world to me <3
@happydays447 you can use a friends snapchat or creat a fake one just for a few minutes so you can send him the message even without expecting any answer the goal here is to get pff everyhting out of you shoulders , and anytime i hope you'll feel better you can do it i believe in you *virtual hugs* <3
@happydays447 Hi. I don't know exactly what you've been through, but I've lost lots of friends too. Can you talk to him? Try to remember all of the joy he brought you and all of the good memories and go with love. Appreciate existing relationships. This has helped me, and I hope it also will for you
:)
@LetsGetBetter08 Thank you so much, but i have tried to talk to him. he wont reply and it honestly hurts. thank you for the advice though
@happydays447 I hope that he responds and that it all turns out. Wish you the best, and glad to help
:)
@happydays447 can you try telling your best friend how you truly feel? try a DEAR WOMAN letter
@staya1ivef0rme61 i have but he dosent care. but thank you for trying to help. :)
@happydays447 I've been in a similar situation, I did something while in a dark place that pushed my best friend away too. She was already dealing with a lot of stuff so I was just the last straw. Eventually we started talking again, mind you it was never the same but it was something. But that did take time. I think that your friend, should he ever choose to, will come around eventually. He likely just needs time to heal/deal with his own stuff. Give it time. In the meantime, I'd give yourself some grace. You were in a dark place, and acted accordingly, and that is okay. What matters is you learn from that and try to move forward otherwise you'l just get stuck in your regret (speaking from experience here lol). But try and cut yourself some slack. I think the things we do while in dark places don't define us, rather how we learn from it and what we do moving forward does (define maybe isn't the best word, but I hope it gets it across well enough). And missing him is absolutely valid, I don't think it's stupid at all. Like I said, try and cut yourself some slack, if you can lessen even some of the guilt it makes it easier to deal with. Sending hugs though.
