Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

First Breakup

ByeByeBirdie22 October 27th, 2021

I'm 22 and going through my first breakup with my partner of about 1.5 years. I naively thought we could be together forever, or at least a very long time, and the breakup came as a surprise. They were very nice about it, it was amicable, but it was not at all mutual. It feels like every minute I'm reminded of another thing that I miss about them or had planned to do with them. Big things like celebrating Christmas together, meeting their friends from high school, watching a Marvel movie we had been anticipating. Little things like the smell of their hair, a kiss on the cheek, them singing love songs to me. I don't know when I'll be able to live my life without constantly being bombarded by memories.

2
sereneSunset26 October 30th, 2021

@ByeByeBirdie22

I can truly empathize with going through your first breakup. There are a lot of attachments (especially emotionally) that come with relationships. There's all the things about the person, their friends and family (as you stated), as well as the various holidays and occasions we have throughout the year to share time with those people we're with.

As you also said, the conclusion of a relationship, especially one where it's not mutual, is a hard thing just by itself. From my own experience, it was natural for me (my brain) to want to replay and remenisce about all the good times. As well as dealing with the feeling and fallout of the loss of the relationship.

For me, I will always remember my first relationship, but I also learned a lot from it, and with the passage of time (and a support system of friends), I was and truly did integrate the experience into my life and moved on in a positive fashion.

I, of course, am not in your head, and would never say "this is how you should/shouldn't feel", but I do want you to know that there is a support system here at 7 Cups--in the form of the forums, chatrooms, and interaction with the active listeners and therapists. :)

1 reply
ByeByeBirdie22 OP October 30th, 2021

@sereneSunset26 Thank you so much for your kind words. I have been feeling very supported by my friends and it is extra special to have this new community of 7 Cups.

load more