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Anxiety and Perfectionism

Chanel18 August 15th, 2020
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Hi,

I hate that my anxiety is paired with the narrative that things need to be perfect. I guess perfectionism stems from my childhood. The trauma involved in our family was under the surface and above the surface, everything needed to be perfect. I feel good having a sense of idea how perfectionist characteristics occurred in my family as a child, but it has now created anxiety in my adult life. I do not feel that everything needs to be perfect, but this conditioning at a young age that "things need to be perfect" has caused some interruption. I am able to realize that when I'm not in social situations but once I step into it, I'm overthinking and in my head. I tend to over analyze every interaction and question if I said the right thing, acted the right way, etc. It frustrates me because I don't want to continue this narrative of being perfect but it almost feels like I have lost control of my body/mind in these social situations. The anxiety completely takes over until I'm alone and able to regroup my thoughts. What are the best ways that have helped you deal with anxiety while in the moment?

Thanks for allowing me to share!

1
dworth257 August 15th, 2020
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@Chanel18 i feel like this may be less of perfection and more of people continuing to push you further and further and hurt you until you feel like everything is always constantly about to become harmful. at least, that's what makes me overanalyze everything in social interactions. people continue RELENTLESSLY crossing my boundaries over and over again so harmfully and intrusively, it creates this anxiety about everything. God, how i wish they would stop.. I used to be so, so confident. It happened over time as people began treating me horribly. But now it's the absolute worst, because they just keep crossing boundaries that should never, ever be crossed -- thinking they're being helpful and are entitled to it. So frustrating. Hopefully the peope in your life don't do that to you, it's a nightmare.

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