I Don’t Like Parties
I’ve always considered my self an introverted person. I don’t have trouble getting a long with people or at least acting like I’m getting along with people. I do have friends, but at the end of the day I like to relax by myself and recharge. Back in high school I had a group of friends that I would hang out with. We were all nerdy and just liked playing video games, table top games, and having lightsaber battles. This was very comfortable to me. My senior year I dated a girl who took me to my first high school party. I didn’t previously drink or smoke. At this party I did way too much and as a result I blacked out. From what I’ve heard from other people during this black out I became aggressive. I yelled at my then girlfriend and tried to get numerous people to fight me. At the end of the night I threw up which is probably the only reason I survived given the amount I drank and my then girlfriend broke up with me for obvious reasons. After that I never liked parties. I don’t like large amounts of wasted people or the loudness. I’ve gone to other parties and for the most part behaved myself. I just dread going. Now I’m almost 23 and my current girlfriend really wanted a party for her birthday. Of course I agreed. The planning has gone disastrous, but I’ve made it work. Now today is finally the day. I woke up already hating that I’ve agreed to this and it’s making me anxious. How do you cope with anxiety at parties?
Firstly - good luck - planning/hosting a party is hard! Even if you're the sort of person who enjoys them. Try not to dwell on what happened before. Today's about today. Advice? If you're going to drink - be sure to take it slow and EAT. Have a few stories/anecdotes lined up. Have some nice things to say about your girlfriend - both to her to about her! Keep yourself busy - take the coats, pour the drinks, serve the food, tidy up as you go, ask people if there's anything you can get them. And if you need to, take a breather in the loo!
@Ardi7 It sounds like you've been through a challenging experience and it's completely understandable that parties might make you feel anxious, especially given your past experience. It's great that you're willing to step out of your comfort zone for your girlfriend's birthday. When it comes to coping with anxiety at parties, one helpful approach is to set personal boundaries and have an exit plan if things become overwhelming. Try to find a quiet space at the party where you can take a break if needed. Focusing on engaging in one-on-one conversations rather than larger groups can also be less daunting. Remember, it's okay to step outside for a moment to breathe and gather your thoughts. Lastly, don't hesitate to communicate with your girlfriend about how you're feeling; she may be able to provide support and understanding during the event. Take it one step at a time, and be kind to yourself.
