Dont know what this is and how to deal with

Lately I havent been feeling good , Even smallest things are bothering me. I couldnt stop crying or stop thinking , eventually I cant breath proper for few hours. It takes lot of time to become normal again. I am an introvert and an overthinker . I cant even open up to people.

I live far away from family now and I grew up seeing my parents and my sister fighting . It became worse during covid time . Even when some fight goes in my home , I try to resolve and calm them but if it doesnt happen , I go to a corner cry and the couldnt breath for few hours . I dont know what that is and why all that is.

I had an ex who abused me physically and emotionally for 6 years almostt , Now m with a better person. But even if someone is slightest sad , I feel its bcz of me and start apologizing and feeling bad thats its all bcz of me and become silent.

Now my parents are forcing to get me married also, all they talk about is money and my marriage , I dont even feel like talking to them . Its a big task for me to finish my everyday call with them. Even with money when growing up I never couodnt ask them , they used to yell and shout at me . Now I feel I became over independent , trying to do everything by myself , asking no help , I feel like I did a crime taking help or taking gifts even.

I no longer have idea how I have become. Thanks for whoever reading this. Hope you are okay!