Thoughts and actions

I’ve been having problems with my addiction since I was a child. I never knew how to really tell anybody because I always thought that there was something wrong with me or with it, but maybe I’m overthinking. Maybe this is something that every man goes through. Maybe this is a thought that every man has. I feel as if it’s OK to sometimes have dark thoughts, but learning to control my actions and not to act on every thought is the problem I’m having