An Evening with H

It was a beautiful evening when H (@Heather225) allowed me some time to interact with them and they so generously shared their thoughts with me. I loved every moment of it, and now I am so happy to share with the community the talk we had:

Question: What would you say to describe your love for the 7cups Community?

H: Is all-consuming too cheesy? :P I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - there is no online community like this one. There isn’t one that can even compare to the level of love and compassion that’s exhibited here on Cups. We are a community of purpose, defined as a community of people who are going through the same process or journey to achieve a similar, often emergent, objective, and our objective is people. But, in my opinion, what sets us apart from other people-driven objectives is the unique passion for listening and volunteering, and the critical importance of every single person’s contributions to the community. We are a culture of collaboration and healing. I can’t recall a day I am not proud of you all.

Question: We’d love to know more about you and your journey so far, not only on cups, but in your life. If comfortable sharing with us, we’d very much like to hear: How did you and your interests evolve over the course of your life so far and how do you see yourself today in relation to your past?

H: I had a rough upbringing. It was a time before online support was available, so I had to do a lot on my own. It was a long hard road to get out of my situation, to build a life for myself, and to find my place in the world. I decided early on that whatever career path I ended up on, I wanted it to specialize in helping people. As a hobby, I started a motivational blog because I never wanted anyone else to go through what I did without anyone to listen. I found 7 Cups through my interest in mental health and peer support and here I am today.

Question: What message would you want to leave for the entire earth through your life?

H: Life is too short to worry about what other people are thinking. Do not compromise your values for anyone. Be your true self because at the end of the day, it’s you who makes the difference in your life. Also this quote by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

: “Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place”

Question: Your presence on cups has always felt warm to me, and I am confident the same is true for many of us. If you could tell the cupsers a few things they can think or do to be more like you, what would those things be?

H: Be nicer to yourself. You’re doing your best. I wasted so much time self-sabotaging with negative cycling thoughts. It took so much work to break that cycle, but you are worth it. Believe me as someone who lived it, you will find ways to love yourself. And don’t compare yourself to others; compete with yourself. That way all you can do is outdo yourself.

Question: Any life tips for us to evolve as good human beings?

H: Give others the benefit of the doubt. You’ll never know what someone is thinking, and you may not know exactly what is going on behind a missed text or a late arrival. Giving the benefit of the doubt allows us to place our attention on what we can control. It takes us away from placing blame, judging, resenting, over to searching for what actions to take to improve, mitigate, or resolve the situation to a better state. It’s also a valuable exercise in compassion, which fits what we do here! It takes practice, but over time, you’ll feel better for it.

Thank you H for taking time for us. We look forward to hearing more from you and working more with you in the community.

This interview is part of the Living with Leaders Interview Series. Learn about the series here