Chat rooms - not for the faint of heart?
Phew! Is it just me, or do you sometimes feel that the chat rooms are not for the faint of heart? It seems like the Wild West in some of them at times. Lol. I've actually had some really nice chat room experiences, but--and I can't believe I'm saying this--have felt the last week or so as though I'd like a chat room for the older, quieter folk. (And, at 50, I can't believe I'm calling myself "older, quieter" folk, lol). You see, I made it a goal today to "practice connection" since I have a tendency (introvert) to isolate, but the seas are rough today ...
Anyway, just taking a break in the 50s forum before I dive back into the fray ... Thanks for listening. 
@friendlyChestnut4964
If that is any consolation, I am 50 also, and felt exactly the same at the start. But I am getting used to it. If they open 50+ chat room, I'll see you there, and we can take it nice and slow! :-)
It gets easier though. I didn't think I would say that about a chat room, ever!
@Charlie40 Thanks. But 50 chats, at least 5 posts per chat. That is overwhelming to me. I dont talk that much. But I appreciate your wanting to help..
@Lauren63
Lol! I meant a chat room for people over 50 year old 😁 (and I imagined that in a kidding way!).
More seriously, it's ok to not use chatrooms like the younger people do. But it is good they are there when we need it.
@friendlyChestnut4964 I agree - have you put in that suggestion? There is a link at the bottom of the home page for feedback.
Not everyone likes talking too much I understand. Tho' you'd be surprised how quickly those chats build up.
@caringPanda45 people under 35 are allowed to be a part of forum chats, but people over 35 cant get in the chat room? Seems to be a double standard..
@caringPanda45 it isnt you. You have been helpful. Just cant make sense here. Sorry.
@Lauren63 Thanks, I can see how it looks like that. It was done before I came and understand it was for the protection of the over 35s from all and sundry, who didn't have the same issues, coming in. It is frustrating given the younger members do post so much in other chats that they get the stats to allow them entry.
Very rarely do I participate in group chat. There are many reasons. I find so much of the conversations fowl, or just plain ridiculous. My issues are very different from that of an 18 year old. Also my perspective is different and not valued. There are some younger people I do talk to but in the last year I have distanced myself greatly from 7 cups.
@mutter3 I agree. Thank you.
@mutter3vI have not distanced myself yet. I still want to believe theres something here for me. To fight the loneliness.
@Lauren63 Thanks😀 I believe if the site will evolve and develop a more mature place to chat things would improve greatly
@friendlyChestnut4964 I hear what you are saying. I think there is something to be said for having a group of 50+ people in discussions. That is something I would really welcome.
I am interested in what kind of topics other people would like to discuss in a Group Chat Room. Any ideas?
I lead mindfulness discussions and have had really good discussions that were incredible and there were a couple that someone seemed bent on disrupting the discussion. But one encouraging sign is that since account email confirmation has been in place there are fewer disrupters and more sincere people wanting to discuss things. I hope this is a trend for the future.
@soulsings
I look forward for a 50+ room and I would love to host discussions in there and also having people's feedback about what they would like to discuss!
Cheers!
Ireally dislike the chatroom atmosphere as it stands. I was forced to spend time i there for my internship requirements and it was torture! The rooms are cliquish and they are uncomfortable because you feel like such an outsider. I am no wall flower. I jump right in and try to engage in a polite manner. Sometimes they bite sometimes I can clear a room like I have bad breath or something. I have even typed that in rooms before after the convos die off when I try to engage. The topics are non-supportive and often off topic for the roomn label. Its an interesting world that I have yet to fully understand...
@JolivetteListens
Hey Jolivette!
Sorry for the negative experience
Sometimes it may be hard to converse alltogether. Someone could feel not comfortable for a reason or another, when it happens it could help to change room and be back a bit later or to have a 1-1 (that for members in seek of support of course)
But coming back to you and given that you are a listener, i would be glad to host discussions for the 50+ and to have you around in the room...what about to give it a try and see how it goes? Sometimes starting from discussions can give you a different perception of being together, focusing all in the same topic.
Thanks for sharing, take care! 
@BeyondTheInvisible That would be amazing! Hosting a room with age specific content would be helpful in connecting our forum members and make us more comfortable, IMHO. 
@JolivetteListens
YES!!
@BeyondTheInvisible
i'm really glad you are so active, and so positive, in the 'Mature' age forums and chats, Beyond~! i look forward to getting to know you better... (as i learn my way around the site...
i have been a regular contributing member of another site, but their chat is far worse than anything i have seen here~ i have given up on that, there... and am hoping to become much more active here~
@GusteeMoon123
Hi Gus, thanks and welcome here!
Sure, I'm really happy to see 7 cups growing by giving space and focusing on supporting also elder people, we can do it, whoo-hooo!
We are close to achieve that, so feel free to show up in forum and to add your name to the tag list so an alert will be shown, when you log-in, about any new thread that will be created. You can do it HERE
Hopefully you will find your caring corner on here
Take care!
@BeyondTheInvisible
thanks, i think i filled out that little url form several times, not sure if once for each thread, or just once, but there i go~! :D
@GusteeMoon123
Fine! will care to check the list to find you in there soon!
@GusteeMoon123 you filled it out once and that is all you need to do. You are good forever !
@JolivetteListens I am sorry you had that experience but I have seen that type of behaviors in some of the chat. I would hope that we can start a new type of discussion that is supportive and focused on a topic that helps the chat stay directed.
If you want to see a different type of chat room you might want to try the Mindfulness Discussions. Some of the people tell me that they are different than in other rooms. If you care to the schedule is here https://tinyurl.com/y9nljx25
@soulsings. Thanks for the information. I really appreciate it.
@JolivetteListens you are welcome.
@friendlyChestnut4964 I like the chatrooms when there's a discussion going on, because it feels more focused instead of a free for all. However, on the flip side people come into the discussion asking for help and are told to seek out a listener, which seems...not very helpful.
@ReadBooksDrinkTea
Hi there!!
Well, when i host a discussion i focus on it and members participating to it, when i am not hosting i am available for 1-1 !
The more listeners are in a room the better it would be to eventually offer a 1-1 if they are free for it, so let's hope we will become more functional on that regard as well 
Thanks for sharing, cheers!
@BeyondTheInvisible Granted I haven't been in too many discussions, but I get the impression that a lot of people seeking help are upset when they are told that a discussion/game is going on and they should seek out a listener. I haven't seen listeners offer their services in the chats.
@ReadBooksDrinkTea
Sometimes i did, I saw some listeners doing that as well...so...you will see me doing that, sooner or later, for sure
Like I said hopefully we can cover that better!
@BeyondTheInvisible hi hun, I agree it would be a good idea for listeners to attend the discussions so if someone does come in they can help them in PM rather than just telling them to find a Listener.
@scarletLand3247
Heya Land, how are you?
Sure, it would be nice to organize something like that to cover 24h listeners' presence in rooms 
@ReadBooksDrinkTea
Hi there! 😊😊!
If you need a listener, I am a listener free to PM. I am available. 😊😊😊😊!
Take care! 😊😊😊!
Would a 50+ chat room require badges and a specific number of chats?
@Lauren63 I have not heard anything floated yet. What are your ideas?
@soulsings O don
@soulsings do whatever the community wants. I will not be there if chats are required. As I I will not talk , just to talk. I dont talk much. And when I have, I have been admonished or deleted. Sorry but what I have to say is irrelevant.
@Lauren63 I think what you have to say is very relevant
@Lauren63
I'm really hoping the groupchat we end up with isn't locked in the same way 35+ is locked. 35+ had so many problems, it became a necessity. However, it still limits others who are only occasional groupchat users yet still important members of the community like yourself. Not everyone wants to spend an extended amount of time chatting away to earn internet points to get into a chatroom. Neither do people want to go into a free for all of an open chatroom, I used to moderate them up until a little while ago, not much fun even for me. Whatever happens, I hope to see you in what we end up with.
<3
@DaveMcGrath Thank you Dave. I appreciate that response. I wish I could talk more. But its not something I do. Someday maybe.
@DaveMcGrath I hear you Dave. What do you think is the best way to do things?
I think badge locking for adults may be a help.
@soulsings
might just be the case for 50+, not sure I'd do the same for 35+ tho.
@DaveMcGrath Yes I agree. I was only thinking of 50+ and the topics that resonate with them.
@DaveMcGrath definitely pros and cons for both. 35+ was open and had to be badge locked I see the same thing happening with 50+. I don't know what the solution is unless it's age locked but then we are back to the locking people out issue.
Hope it's made sense as I'm rather tired tonight
@friendlyChestnut4964 I totally understand you! Have only found it breatheable in the 35+ though, do recommend it over the others, it is usually quite serious, and okay-paced for me. I'm not even 35, yet alone 50, but I guess I can say I totally have a faint heart! Hope to see you around 35+
Chiming in on my esperience in group chats: First- I find that it varies greatly and no rhyme or reason what will be said and by whom. For instance, I sometimes hang in Healthy Living since that topic interes me in particular. Often, foks are chatting on anything but that subtopic, and sometimes just amoung themselves, as if they know each other but the rest of us don't. I find is most helpful if there is a MOD onboard, but there is no way that can be assured 24/7. If I just jump in and there isn't a health topic, I may suggest one, and I try to draw out the quiet ones for at least a check in, how are U doing. I'm not a Listener, but I try to do that anyway to make everyone feel comfortable and included.
The most helpful times are chats when there is a Leader/Mod on a given topic and they keep things on track. I'd love a 50 plus group also. There is just a more mature( hopefully) mindset with problems we face as we age.
Thanks for the thread and invite for input.
