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Attitude/perspective about getting older

friendlyChestnut4964 March 23rd, 2018

Okay, so I'm struggling a bit today. The last year I have gone on a rollercoaster ride of acceptance and depression about getting older. It seems as though my body has hit the turbo button on all the signs of aging - I look in the mirror, and someone completely different is looking back at me. Because today is one of my "low" days, I just feel depressed and dismayed ... I always wanted and hoped I'd be one of those people who aged "gracefully," finding the positives in it and embracing it. I'm kind of beating myself up over this "attitude" problem, especially because I just turned 50 a month ago. I know that's not that old, but .... I'm struggling with self compassion vs lecturing and getting angry at myself.

So, I thought I'd share this struggle; just own up to it. Also, I'd love to hear others' feedback on how to embrace getting older and/or their struggles with it (I can't be alone in this, can I?). Thanks for listening, everybody. smiley

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Ranmusic March 23rd, 2018

@friendlyChestnut4964 i understand what you're going through. I'm 57 and have been through some major things including prostate cancer. I'm doing ok now but finally, I'm sitting back thinking that i refuse to give in to my age or my limitations. Yesterday, my 9 year old daughter wanted to have a foot race with me. I wasn't sure if I could do it effectively but I accepted the challenge. And I left her eating my dust! She was actually happy about that because she worries about my age and being too old. Ok, granted, she is 9 and it wasn't terribly difficult to beat her but I sure felt it in my knees afterwards! There will be a day where she will beat me, guaranteed. And I hope to be graceful enough to accept it.

So now, I'm going to buy a mountain bike and get myself back into shape. And have some fun! But I will have those days where I'll look in the mirror and see that I'm not that young kid anymore. It's ok to reminisce. And maybe be depressed about it. But try to live now and enjoy what you can. It's the best time!

4 replies
naturebike May 23rd, 2018

@Ranmusic I have found that exercise has helped me to feel better about myself. I hope you enjoy mountain biking and the freedom you feel when out on a bike. I use my exercise time as a fun time to let go of stress and embrace just living. Work up slowly to a goal and you may shock yourself how much stronger and fit you can get. WIshing you the best of luck!

3 replies
Ranmusic May 23rd, 2018

@naturebike I did get my bike about 2 months ago and I love it. I do anywhere from 15 to 20 miles most days of the week. I feel more fit than I've ever been and it's starting to show benefits to my overall health.

However, I'm really glad you are getting benefits from it too. 😊

2 replies
friendlyChestnut4964 OP May 24th, 2018

@Ranmusic - Now that the weather is finally getting better, you've inspired me to get my bike out of storage and maybe try something different for exercise. :-)

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friendlyChestnut4964 OP March 24th, 2018

Thanks, @Ranmusic - I think younger kids help remind us that you're never too old to be young at heart. I love that you jumped in and ran the foot race with your 9-year-old. Part of my problem, I'm sure, is that my kids are now teenagers, and we're going through all these "adult" decisions (college prep, learning to drive, etc.) that help accentuate my feeling old. Seems like just yesterday they were my sidekicks. It helps to hear how others are negotiating this journey. Thanks so much for sharing. :-)

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