Making Friends in New City At Age 41
Hello! I moved to my area 6 years ago but due to a tumultuous marriage it has been really hard to make friends since I was depressed all the time. Since we separated, I feel a lot more peaceful at home but even these last 2 years have been difficult to meet compatible friends and form deep connections. Where does one meet friends in their late 30s and 40s when one is not religious or athletic and most people in that age group are busy with their lives or not wanting to make new friends? I had a horrible incident with coworkers years ago so making friends at work is not an option. I've been fighting intense feelings of isolation on the weekends and hope I can make real friendship connections soon. Thank you
@pioneeringTalker8216
I'm in the same boat! I've been depressed and anxious for the last few years to an extreme and haven't been able to make new friends and lost some that I had. It's so hard to meet people now. I'm also non-religious or not athletic. (Even though I need to be more active haha)
I'm nearing 30 now and feel like my life has been at a standstill and having no support system or friends to forget the world with have made it more difficult. Feel free to message me anytime, maybe we'll find that we can be friends? :)
I'm in a similar situation. New town. Newly separated. My ex was very controlling and isolated me from my old friends and family. Since splitting I've found it hard to make friends. I debated joining a church, I went once but decided it wasn't for me.
What has worked for me is joining a dating app and seeking out friends that way. I was very honest on my profile about who I am and what I'm looking for and was able to meet a few women for platonic friendships that way.
Also, I decided to get back on social media. I found local FB groups dedicated to my interests. So, if you're in to sewing maybe find a sewing group. If you like yardsales join a yardsale group. Look for local events posted on social media.
Most important, get out of the house and do things you enjoy. Go for a walk, go out to eat/drink/shop, etc. Try to chat with the cashier. The woman behind you in line. Go get your hair and nails done.
You will meet people. Or you will at least find new hobbies and interests and live your best life.
Hi Fragile! Love these suggestions! Thank you so much for all the great ideas! I am glad you are making meaningful connections.
Hey! I can relate to you too, in a way. I grew up with really controlling parents who didn’t give me a lot privacy (in fact, my dad told me he can read my mind so he’ll know if I have any bad thoughts). I had a few friends when I was a child but I slowly isolated myself and lost them. I developed chronic depression and generalised anxiety disorder. I entered into relationships. My first ex was super controlling and humiliated me. As time passed, I slowly realised that I’ve lost all friends and have none to turn to. I’m about to move in to a new city but I’m scared of having no friends and no one to stop me when my mind plays tricks with me. Hopefully I do find a few friends here, or there :)
Hi,
I am a (almost) 40 year old woman stuck in a small town. I am divorced with no kids so I do not fit in with the local community very well. I have a great sense of humor and am a really great person though. It is just really hard to meet people to get to know.
My therapist suggested doing things listed in other posts, like joining clubs or organizations that I am interested in. However, I have not found any here and I am chronically ill so my energy is limited. I really just want someone to talk with because the loneliness makes me really anxious sometimes.
I am interested in getting to know some of you who have posted already, if that is good with you. :)
Jessica
