Finding friends near my age. I feel lonely.

@resourcefulFriend2347 i've had and know people that have also had good luck on reddit, they have a lot of subreddits like r/makenewfriendshere , r/makefriendsover30, and things like that.  i found my best friend on that and a bunch of other more casual friends.  and a good friend of mine found his fiance by posting on reddit forums looking for a special someone.  i wish you good luck, and big hugs

Even though I'm far away from you I'm near your age and would love to be your friend

So hard to make new friends. You done all I would suggest.

Mel Robbins suggests a coffee shop every morning.

i actually ised to go to the town coffee shop a lot of mornings and did make friends with a group of retirees that would hang out there.

Hi @resourcefulfriend2347

Extra ideas for you to try

look on ***, eventbrite or nextdoor for groups or activities that you could join

Try making a post yourself and see who turns up

( I did this on next door when i was looking for a tennis partner)

Or you could setup a group

Borrow a dog

You can join borrowmydoggy or put a volunteer post on one of the ***/nextdoor dog lover user groups

I always get talking with lots of people i might not have normally spoken to when dog sitting.

Fitness club

This could be a new gym with classes or a club like parkrun

Try joining classpass

This is a membership clup where you get so many points that you can use to join classes at different gyns

Bear in mind .. in December people will be traveling away for Christmas etc .. but there will be lots more people out there trying new things in January

Is it possible for you to move to a different city?

Trying to make new freinds in a small town vs big city is more challenging

Be open on the age bracket.. there are plenty of spritely old people and mature young people .. focus on people with common interest

Good luck

Rednest

Hi. I also struggle with this. I've tried allsorts and nothing really sticks.

I'm into board games and plucking the courage to go to groups in the new year. Maybe look at interest groups on FB and then find local connections.

I hear this, and have same experience.   Im 59 but seem to be too young for the available older crowds, and too old for the late adults -30s to 40s. Most my age are still working and physically active…i had to stop working from a health issue that I’m still rebuilding from.   

I did Meetup, online social, neighborhood game night, cooking classes, even a monthly game group.  I have been volunteering at library over 2 years… great people but none available for a closer friendship.   

I envy the people who can plop into a new place and thrive in joining activities. I’m too self conscious and also too sensitive to the harshness of most people.   Ho hum.  

@resourcefulFriend2347 I'm far but we can be friends 

It's like you could be talking about me - 43, medium UK city, trying different avenues to meet people, starting an astronomy course soon but already anticipating that I will go along and sit for two hours not speaking to anybody. Found a Social Anxiety Group on Meetup but guess what - so far I have been too socially anxious to attend! 

I thought for many years I didn't need friends, my family was enough, then the loneliness has just hit me recently and quiet now seems more like silence.

Hello. Can we be friends?? I'm 27

À few years back (2017/2018), I heard a podcast on how to make friends as an adult. I can't find it right now, but I remember some things stuck with me:

1) Social research suggests it takes spending 50 - 90 hours with someone before you go from acquaintance to casual - good friend.

2) If you join a social club, you build confidence and connections faster if you have a "job" in that group.

I guess this could be discouraging, but it was really a relief for me, because I was trying groups and not really making friends.

For me, it was a D&D group that ran events with multiple tables. I started just by attending, then I invited a few people to home grand one-shots. I also became a DM for the events. I attended their DM workshops and went out for dinner after a few of those. They had a *** and I got involved with that, and lead mini-events through that online. I can say, looking back... It worked! I don't have a best friend from that, but I have a few good friends and a community that has helped me through a lot. I've driven some to appointments & we look out for each other.

So I promise it is possible, though it takes time and effort. It can also feel vulnerable so be prepared for that.