Mid 33s i guess
Hi
I need to unwind but I don't see a point, opening up isn't my thing and have been absorbing since I was in early teens, God, it has been do long.
I don't have friends, rather sometimes a fleeting feeling!
I don't talk much coz nothing excites me.
Everyday is like a robotic activity to be performed and nothing else. My whole life I've felt like this. Early teenage life was exploration and empty. T20s was depression, emptiness and sadness. 30s is carrying bit of both, sadness and numbness. Its so exhausting now. I feel so fkng hollow that I don't even want to fake a smile, which I did for the most parts of my life.
So in 30s, no friends or relationship, with family but nothing have to share with them, no office stories coz I feel like *** there. No hobbies, no desires, purely alive coz my time hasn't come yet.