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ASilentObserver profile picture
Attention All 35+! Join your 24/7 Group Chat today!
by ASilentObserver
Last post
September 30th
...See more Hello community, We are excited to announce that we are opening 35+ group chat as an exclusive 24/7 chat group, just for those of us who are 35 and over w.e.f Monday, April 22, 2024. This is a space to connect with others in your age group, share experiences, have meaningful conversations, and build a supportive community to encourage and empower each other. To ensure this group remains a safe space for everyone, the chat will be badge-locked. This means only users who have their age as 35 or over will be able to access the group chat.  Here's what makes this group special: * 24/7 access: Keep the conversation flowing, day or night! * Exclusive community: This group is badge-locked, ensuring only users 35 and over can join, fostering a space tailored to your life stage. * In-depth discussions: Dive into meaningful conversations on topics you care about. A few group chat guidelines to keep in mind: * Respectful Communication: Let's all treat each other with kindness and courtesy. * Positive Vibes: We encourage uplifting and engaging conversations. * Life Experiences: Share your wisdom, stories, and support. * Open-mindedness: Be receptive to different perspectives. * No Spam: Let's keep the chat focused and respectful. Let’s join and participate. Please spread the word to your 35+ friends and invite them to participate with you in the group chat for some supportive & meaningful conversations. 
ASilentObserver profile picture
Weekly Prompt #1: What are some unexpected challenges and triumphs you've encountered in your 30s and beyond?
by ASilentObserver
Last post
July 26th
...See more Welcome to 35+ Community,  As we navigate through our 30s and beyond, life presents us with unexpected challenges and triumphs that shape our experiences and perceptions and define who we are. These years bring a unique set of experiences and test our resilience, patience and push us out of our comfort zones, and ultimately lead to personal growth. Let's explore and share some of the surprising obstacles and victories that many of us encounter during this stage of life. Question of the week: What are some unexpected challenges and triumphs you've encountered in your 30s and beyond? Please share and discuss together. Also, you can join us in 35+ group support chats [https://www.7cups.com/chat/?c=mmdmeXyUkeJO45VriIjD] for live discussions and exploration as well.  Click here to join! [https://www.7cups.com/chat/?c=mmdmeXyUkeJO45VriIjD]
forcefulBirch2526 profile picture
Heartbreak
by forcefulBirch2526
Last post
15 hours ago
...See more How has your heartbreak 💔 changed your life
sociableBirch35 profile picture
Depressed, lost & seeking a mum figure for guidance
by sociableBirch35
Last post
21 hours ago
...See more Im trying to figure out what my purpose is after both my parents have died. I feel like I need a mother figure as I can't figure anything out. I have Depression, fibromyalgia, lupus and PCOS, I don't have any kids, pets or partner. I have 2 sisters near by one is divorced with 2 teenage boys that I love. She cares but out relationship is overwhelming as I get PTSD when she talks about our parents in a negative way. I have distanced myself as I find I'm anxious when I am alone with her. My other sister is very busy with two young kids and a husband who works away i struggle to open up as we never can have a moment to talk. I'm 35 and I've been through bullying and abuse. I'm now struggling with how to live as my body is in pain and I'm not able to think confidently about what I want and how to make it happen. I feel stuck and hopeless. I want to help people but I'm afraid to feel things. I don't know where I belong. I wish I could find a healthy mother figure or father figure to guide me as all I want is to feel safe and secure.
CalmFinder profile picture
12 years of apparent MDD, after 7 years of properly diagnosed, and Declining
by CalmFinder
Last post
2 days ago
...See more Is having a 'super judgemental family but at the same time (they are) generally good people' is everyone's problem? Judgemental towards you (especially) just because you're the family so they can say whatever they want by claiming that they know you better? While being so considerate to other people, and able to think positive about other people's behaviour but not yours? At this age, enough is enough. Whoever you have become today doesn't seem to change their perspective towards you. I'm a Professional Communication Specialist myself. The irony. People always come to me for advice. But that doesn't help you at all in dealing with this type of family. They will just simply push you until you break - even that, is the biggest point for them blame you over and over again when you react. Being the youngest - you will always become the immature one in the family, the most emotional one, the most psycho. While those are actually the result of being judged all the time. All your life. Even worse, to have not-so-understanding spouse. Can never handle your 'peak' reactions when it happens, thus will push you away while an embrace, good words or good ears are all you need. Not all the time. But only during that effing time! The best part, all of your illness come back, flare up. Due to those effing stupid issues! Stress related illness! Flare up eczeme, unstable angina, severe migraine and blurred vision. Feel like dying!
Clio9876 profile picture
Has anyone managed to teach children to enjoy chores?
by Clio9876
Last post
2 days ago
...See more Please share your tips. I think it is possible with small children. Because they value the attention. But what about teenagers? My mum resented chores. So I think the main thing she taught me was to resent them. Eventually I realised that I needed to stop doing chores because I was "supposed to" and start doing them for me. So I wash the dishes because I hate not having clean things to eat with. And I pay the bills because I don't want to live without light and water. Etc. And I found that when I viewed chores as things that make my life nicer, I liked doing them better. Is this something that is possible to inspire in a teenager, or something they have to discover for themself? Of course, there's always the reward/payment route. But I'm very interested if anyone has managed to inspire a love of doing chores. Or had it inspired in themself. How do you think it happened?
forcefulBirch2526 profile picture
Friends
by forcefulBirch2526
Last post
2 days ago
...See more In life you meet a lot of people where some of them makes you feel close to them, but for a short time. While i was small, I used to have lot of friends. We used to play all the time and we felt we were inseperarable. We used to wait for each other in the bus stop and we felt that this bond remains same forever. As I grew older, forever is just a myth . When my friends shifted their priorities , they began to replace our friendship. Today when we go to the same bus stop, we would behave like known strangers. Different time, different mindset and same place. It's not their fault. Some people come into our life for a limited time frame and leave us footprints deeply engraved in our heart. While some of them breaks our spirits and take a part of us when they leave. I remember as I grew older, when my close friends stop making time for our frindship, I would chase behind them for that familiarity, only to end up being a placeholder in their life. I remember crying all the time. Some of them hurted me at last knowing that i am the most sensitive and naive soul. One thing what our heart find difficult to accept is that " people change and its not in our control". You don't need to have lot of friends in your life. Even a friend who is utmost true and genuine to you matters a lot in today's world. You don't need to talk to them everyday. Their presence make you feel home .Today I am alone and lonely and today I want to share all my love and care to all my friends and family in this app. How was friendship mean to you?
Tinywhisper11 profile picture
🎅 what was the most popular toy during your childhood??🎅
by Tinywhisper11
Last post
3 days ago
...See more Let us know, maybe santa will bring back a little festive spirit in you ❤
zeetee17 profile picture
Depressed and defeated
by zeetee17
Last post
Wednesday
...See more Ive been dealing with betrayal trauma for almost 3 years. The pain still overwhelms me. couoles therapy helps sometimes but the ptsd from it is crippling. i feel like i'm doomed to be broken hearted for the rest of my life
forcefulBirch2526 profile picture
How a broken woman falls in love
by forcefulBirch2526
Last post
Tuesday
...See more When a woman actually falls in love, it takes time. Especially those woman who once had traumatic past. Just because you are chasing her doesn't mean she will fall in love with you. She will sit alone and think of her wounds. She might be so engaged with her work yet she will spend time observing you ,introspecting whether you are worth fighting for. To fall in love with a woman like her is to understand that to reach her heart, you have to climb the highest walls around her heart, to walk on the thorns and sometimes you might even drown in the waters of her emotional tears. Trust me ,she is fed up of lovebombing. She is fed up of continuous messages, words of appreciation, expensive gifts and your attraction. You cant earn her trust by showing your love like in disney movies or any other movies, shows or even books. As she grows up, she realise that trust is an expensive thing that needs to be earned.There might be amazing guys out there or people of her choice, yet when she truly loves you, nothing will stop her thinking of you. She might fail in expressing how she feels about you, but trust me, it takes time. She has to go through all her traumas, reopening her past wounds and might even go through a spiral of emotions. She might be surrounded with heartbreaks, and trust me, she might be pessimistic of yours too. Her heart is so delicate that has been stomped by the wrong souls in her life and sometimes she may act so distant and withdrawn to protect her heart from crushing. Even if you show your greatest love towards her, she still needs time to sew her scars in her heart because once she opens her heart again, you shall never question her love. The moment you set your foot on her heart, as she opens the door for you, you would see that behind her giganamous walls, are the set of treacherous obstacles that might make your feet bleed. Sometimes she might be withdrawn , too sensitive, sometimes angry, sometimes little smile or worse stays silent. For a sailor to reach the other side of the land, it takes a courage heart to maneuver the vessel to aim for what he truly wants . Once you reach her delicate heart after years and years of walking through her obstacles, trust me, that's when you truly earn her trust. She would have lots of love to give but trust me , with a little essence of observing you from afar. Just because she finally opens her soul doesn't mean she would stop prioritising from further hurt. Even when she falls in love with you gradually, like a water slowly absorbing though the intricate depths of soil, she would have also started arranging the thread and needle to sew her future scars because of what if. When she falls in love, she doesn't just falls. Her eyes are now well clear with all the tears that rejuvenates her eyes. She either rises in your love or rises to find herself with more self love . That's how I fall in love
forcefulBirch2526 profile picture
Relationship
by forcefulBirch2526
Last post
Tuesday
...See more The relationship would be so beautiful if men sticks to the role of provider and protector serving masculine role and woman sticks to the role of feminine touch and nurturer, provided both have their own life and individuality. It doesn't mean one can control each other and supports inequality. Both must be equal, independent and contributing equally in relationship. It doesn't mean men can't express emotions and women must suppress emotions. Both must be there for each other in good and bad times. I have seen women taking up masculine role and men taking up feminine role, cnsidering their upbringing and experience . But i just dont know. Many won't support my point but I am just my pov. I respect other pov. I maybe right or wrong..I am into traditional relationship. I have seen my grandparents. 
forcefulBirch2526 profile picture
Depression
by forcefulBirch2526
Last post
Monday
...See more Sometimes you wake up,tired,demotivated, only to find yourself waiting for the day to get over. You just don't want to talk to people. You just want to stay far away, so far away that they don't want to see you again. Sometimes you find yourself endlessly scrolling through phone or sometimes you just find yourself being alone and crying, only to wipe your tears and wear a mask and pretend that everything is alright. Sometimes you wish to talk to someone, a real soul but sometimes you wish you never exist .Sometimes you feel like floating on the sea . Sometimes you wish floating in the universe. Sometimes you wish there was no time and sometimes you wish all the time in that one day. Sometimes you wish for someone to call your name and sometimes you wish to run away as far as you can. Sometime you laugh too much until people finds you wierd or crazy, only to end up crying loudly, yet silently..... And you say to yourself " I will be fine soon"
zeetee17 profile picture
Depressed and defeates
by zeetee17
Last post
Sunday
...See more Its been almost 3 years since I experienced the entire collapse of my world and now suffering from ptsd and betrayal trauma. We've been doing couples counseling the day after i found out and I do individual counselling. I've been put on medication to deal witg my ptsd, anxiety and depression from all this. I just feel like no matter giw much he's changed, I'm damaged for life. I'm stuck grieving over this failed life. I just lost all motivation for life and I only live now for my son
SparklySeas49 profile picture
What am I doing
by SparklySeas49
Last post
Saturday
...See more I think too much, but here goes.  Pardon the grammar gaps. I joined this site because have no one who understands and I cannot sit with my thoughts alone.  Looking around here see a lot of voices, needing reassurance guidance venting, you name it.  All good reasons.   I can’t help but wonder how my voice will be heard here.  How it will help to type into the space, my personal details issues.  Sure I hope to hear feedback opinions, … would love ultimately find a close friend that I totally click but I know that’s not likely.  Ive done online therapy, group support, one on one… its a lot of typing and SO time consuming. Do I start with my restlessness from loneliness and isolation?  Or the issues that got me here because they surely lurk unresolved.  I feel I’m preaching to the choir to say that I have found not a single person who can ease my pain, after years. Ive followed guidance advice gratitude reframing god i could list dozens of homework.  My reward? Ive actually broken family connection by trying to get support from them because i have no one else.  What an utter shitshow.   I feel my mind is shutting down from the overwhelm and futility while things continue as they have been for years.   Hopeless and helpless they call it.  How is a human supposed to overcome, survive even, let alone thrive.  Thanks for reading this far. 

Welcome to the 35 and over community!  Our aim is to provide an inviting space for those of us who are over 35 to find like-minded people, discuss our concerns, and reminisce over a cup of tea  :)   


(Adults), Join us in the Thirty-Five & Over Room every Wednesday! 

Would you like to be added to the Tag List?  Please reply to this thread Here

Our ever-growing support team are here to help you with any questions, so feel free to send us a message :)  Interested in joining the team?  Please PM 7cups.com/@MistyMagic

Please respect others' opinions, even if we strongly disagree. There is no right or wrong answer here. Please avoid conflict or arguments. 

Thank you!

Community Guidelines

The following are the guidelines which are specific to the 35 & Over Community. We ask you to follow them, as well as the Forum Guidelines. Their purpose is to ensure a safe and supportive environment for everyone.

The main goal of this sub-community is to offer support and a space to share and socialize, for the 7 Cups users who are 35 years old, or older. After reaching a certain age, people have specific life concerns that might not be shared by people who don't have as much life experience.
However, age isn't a requirement to participate in our sub-community.

All Adults are welcome!


However, please understand that teens as young as 13 years old can access these forums, so please keep topics appropriate.

So please:
- Reach out for support from your member account
- Offer support as a member or listener
- Be respectful to everyone
- Add a trigger warning  [TW] if your topic needs it
- Take care of yourself
- Take care of others
- Have fun!


 

For more detailed information about how to behave in the forums and in 7 Cups in general:

Community Guidelines
Member Reputation

Listener Reputation

 

Community Resources

Welcome to the 35 and over community!  Our aim is to provide an inviting space for those of us who are over 35 to find like-minded people, discuss our concerns, and reminisce over a cup of tea  :)   


(Adults), Join us in the Thirty-Five & Over Room every Wednesday! 

Would you like to be added to the Tag List?  Please reply to this thread Here

Our ever-growing support team are here to help you with any questions, so feel free to send us a message :)  Interested in joining the team?  Please PM 7cups.com/@MistyMagic

Please respect others' opinions, even if we strongly disagree. There is no right or wrong answer here. Please avoid conflict or arguments. 

Thank you!