Idk whether to go back home and admit defeat and live w my abusive mom or stay at uni city, find a job, live alone and struggle to take care of myself

When i finish with studies dad will stop paying my rent and I will have to either go home permanently or find a job and stay here permanently and im terrible at taking care of myself and live alone and on a tiny, dirty place but at home mom's drinking and worrying me. If i knew what im doing, i would know whether to stay here this week or go home. I don't even have water