Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Comunidad /

20 & Over Community Forum

Create a New Thread
Gif Photo Link
tommy profile picture
20+ Automated Taglist!
by tommy
Last post
November 15th
...See more Welcome to the 20+ Taglist This thread is an auto-updating list. The list is regularly updated by forum leaders and can be found below. Having issues? Reply below and someone will help you! Why should I join the taglist? ✔ Never miss out on sub-community check-ins, discussions or events ✔ Get tagged and notified by community leaders whenever a new relevant thread has been posted ✔ Become a more active member of the community. What do I need to do? ✅ To add yourself to this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please add me. ❌ To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please remove me. ------------------------- Current taglist as of 29th July (updated by @tommy) @azuladragon34 @Dawnie0203 @forcefulThinker186 @HarmonyBlossom @Racey08 @Rainer111 @TannDee @tommy
pandanfe profile picture
Let's discuss issues
by pandanfe
Last post
October 28th
...See more What are the adult issues that you would like to discuss? 
quietOrange3289 profile picture
Feeling down
by quietOrange3289
Last post
1 day ago
...See more A guy told me I’m not marriable because I have schizoaffective and wasn’t able to take care of the house due to injuries at the time. So depressed.
reliableCamp9106 profile picture
Attracting the wrong type.
by reliableCamp9106
Last post
2 days ago
...See more I need to get this off my chest and here's the only place I can really talk about my feelings. My first ex made me fall in love and then pulled away and got distant. I later found out that I wasn't his only boyfriend and he had been cheating the entire relationship. Obviously it ended after that I then dated a lovely person, normal and friendly. Yet I had no feelings develop for him so I had to leave it. My most recent partner has pretty much treated me the same as the first. I fell in love, he pulled away, dumps me. Within a few days he's seeing someone new. I strongly believe it was happening before he left me. Honestly I have a feeling I'm going to be stuck in a vicious cycle of liking guys that are truly awful people, because I'm too trusting and naive when it comes to feelings. Has anyone got any experiences similar, and can anyone recommend certain things to look for in a guy that are either red or green flags
limePrune2761 profile picture
How to less negative with my thoughts ?
by limePrune2761
Last post
Tuesday
...See more My friend has told me that I have been too negative with my thoughts and I told her that I would take a little time to process my emotions and feelings. I feel that she is a good friend but have never explicitly told her that, so that’s why I am taking the break to speak to someone about my emotions
livbinny profile picture
Being used n people Leaving you…..
by livbinny
Last post
December 9th
...See more I have something very important to speak about and I wanted to tell you because well I don’t have friends I don’t have company. Everything is lonely and I need to talk about this somewhere you know so if you’re a giver like me and you just give too much and you end up with nothing at all *** it’s just not this. I always was like thinking that this is just a confidence and all I have is like being lonely and scared and Everything on my own and of course it’s not fair to always like give yourself back what other student you know because you never deserve it but let me tell you this is the weekend and I’m 22 and this is the first weekend when I did learned that I was being used so I realize like everything that is about giving too much being open trusting and friendly you can just really be yourself if you know that this is not working like be a better version of yourself and try to be cautious and I’ve have been told like so much. You know to protect yourself because I don’t really have any limits when it comes to giving my only boundaries worse if people were to attack me badly you know so I was thinking that if I have constant judgment of family that if I put my hopes out to the world, I would find what I want, but that was not it because the people if they just all see like my energy positivity and everything and basically they took it from me they feed off and basically they sucked it out of me because it’s been so many people that in the beginning I never I never viewed a mass wrong people. You know I see everybody has good person deserving of the same and like we should be kind it can change someone’s day and whether this is stranger or a family member I always end up giving And being generous way too much then I’m empty and there’s like nobody that can help me or stand by me because I realize that those people leave me they have told me and this is what hurts so much but here I want to say and please ignore that day with the flower it’s I’m using speech recognition because this is so hard to write But I realize that you can’t always give too much and not just that but I was just thinking that I was being confident because you give so much so like you are not afraid to be with people and all of that but this they took me for granted and they left me after sometime when they got what they want or when they got bored, I mean, I just learned what they were thinking or what it’s all means that when people suddenly goes to you or they like disappear suddenly they become busy or something and he wondering why when everything first of all it was like all right the start or about a month or a few weeks it really lasted so I couldn’t tell And I was never told this. Nobody told me this so I never know that this is not good for me and it can be harmful even since even when I have good intentions and I’m a good person and I see people as being good if they don’t harm me, they are not good because I feel like abandonment is a form of abuse because basically One day they finally leave you. You know when it’s gone so I just want to say that if you feel the same if you feel alone and if you also feel hurt and if you feel like there is like no other way, like you just feel a hopeless or lifeless, I feel like an empty person without energy. I feel like stabbing to this reality just to know that I was being used so many times if you have the same egg just like no the this paining you must let it hurt. I can do much about it. It still hurts me. It is so hard to process because I have anxiety. I have anger. I’m like what happened you know all this time and it was with every person that I would go giving too much gift their care attention everything just to earn some of theirs, but I realized that this hope I was putting for to them was just reflection of my own and they never really fight for me so please don’t fight for anyone and you must know who deserves it and who doesn’t I’m here just preaching, but I just learned this weekend but I’m glad I did because if it was too late if I continue just a few more years, I don’t know what I would end because it told detrimental to my own mental state that it’s so hard but in the beginning, I wasn’t feeling drained. I was just constantly like I like I’m this friendly person so like I go out there and you know, be friends and mean there’s people like share something together and be happy But suddenly where it doesn’t work this way and once people see that you give as much they can take it and teach quickly and use you without you being aware I wasn’t aware at all because you know I don’t have any limit when it came to giving to me. This was normal but to other people you know what happens So I’m just saying that I’m just so sad. This is so hard to be alone and you have to be mentally strong even now I can trust too much. I must count on myself and my heel on my own you know to restore and repair everything they took from me, which is very hard, but I will never make a mistake mistakes again I will never repeat this patterns and I actually have to put less and I’m now like Now. I’m just thinking like oh so I don’t really have to put so much anywhere like I have been trying this my whole life so you know this is just so hard, but you got to accept the pain and really move on and be the better you and stop trying too hard and too much when I see other people that are in my shoes they try too much. They stress over it because you know for other people I’m like just don’t because The right people I mean, let people come to you and let’s see if they are worthy and deserving of your kindness and everything you have to offer, but don’t try too hard because it’s not worth to try this hard. Will you end up like me and I never wish this to anyone but I hope those people will be aware of the pain they have cost me and anybody else who is this as much giving and Was like this in this world
unassumingNest3857 profile picture
Hello 7 cups it's great to meet yall
by unassumingNest3857
Last post
December 9th
...See more i just lost a best friend of mine after 5 years from breakup yeah it hurts so much but you know something I got that friend from here 7 cups, I know it's a best way to get good friends but I feel so lonely now, I'm interested in long term friendship I will talk to anyone any time of the day, just that this grief I'm over with, and now I'm lonely with no friends added that I'm an introvert and don't conversate well on voice but mind me I'm quite a chatterbox on chats I know 7 cups is a non-judgemental place so I wish I could get atleast short term friends friends here who can get me through hard times of my life, thanks for reading my post, see you on the chat side :))
Ab429 profile picture
Confused with my ex girlfriend
by Ab429
Last post
December 7th
...See more I'm in a weird spot with my ex who I love still. We hooked up about 4 months ago and since then we have been talking every day, going out and hanging alot. Supporting each other, basically best friends, I've stayed at her place, hung out with her and her mom. Everything was going really well. Last weekend we went out together with mutual friends for her birthday, and I got too drunk and had a low blood sugar episode (I'm type 1 diabetic) After that she got upset and her one friend made things worse. So I apologized and she started getting into other things. She told me that since we hooked up she hasn't been with anyone else, and that we need to talk. I understand she was angry at the time. I apologize and we talked out that situation,  we still have to have the big talk. We made plans to hang out again. Since then we have been back on talking terms but not as good as it was before, I know she is busy but I feel lower priority than before. All signs point to her wanting to get back together. but I'm afraid to have the conversation Like in my heart I know she's a good person, and she knows how I feel. So I don't think she would drag me along. She also has doesn't need my friendship, she has plenty of friends. Mentioning that she hasn't been with anyone else since we hooked up. Calling and or texting me daily. Hanging out all the time, I feel like she wants to get back together. But I'm so afraid of rejection I'm afraid to have the conversation as much as I feel she wants to be together deep down, I know that before she was really fighting it ans sticking to her guns. Doesn't help that her one friend is against us getting back together.
CallumKing2000 profile picture
Stress, stress and more stress.
by CallumKing2000
Last post
December 7th
...See more Hello my name is callum. I am 23 years of age (will be 24 this year) anyway I chose to join this thread community and share a little bit about myself and a bit of my life I had to learn at a teenager and hadn't really had that chance to live as they say when your young. Anyway when I was around 16 I chose I wanted to leave home and move out this was around early 2017 just as I was leaving school. I wanted my own company and wanted to see what it was like. I was scared and frightened like anyone would be at such a young age to make such big decisions like that. That wish came true a year and a 3 months later (September 2018) I moved out into my first ever home. I was 17 a month before my 18th Living on my own scared and petrified while I was going to college, it was a support system house for young people expect I was the only one there. With time it got really good and I enjoyed it, things were very stressful at that age I was paying bills washing my own laundry doing the electricity and gas bill paying rent at 17. I hardly even knew about things like this and was always scared that if I didn't pay these bills on that exact date they'd evict me straight up, but I had support workers so it was more of a relief when they helped me with this stuff. Fast forward January 2020 I am 19, getting ready for my first ever council flat. This was when things took a huge turn in life. I was by myself. Had only my mother for a support system but it was stressful and I hardly understood what I was doing. I'd receive mail from Bill companies and when u move in a home they always backdate things for you to pay when u missed late payments etc. Took me 1 whole year to understand this and how it works but by February 2021 (20) I finally got hang of it. I liked it but as time went on I was feeling very unhappy I didn't like where I was living. Things were changing. People were passing away and I was getting older realising that my teens were spent on working on moving out and paying bills and sorting things out and appointments and stuff like that was my real world. I had loud neighbours all they would do is play loud music all the time. They would party all day and all night and my anxiety was through the roof I couldn't Watch TV or play on my video game so I would go to the bathroom sit on the floor and use my earphones and put them In to block sound out. And sit there and be upset. So by 2022 December being age 22 i was stuck with such bad news that my mother's fiance had sadly passed away from (TW) Suicide. This hit us hard. I only spoke to this guy 2 hours beforehand and he was gone. It took a turn on me for the worse as it did my mother too. So I chose I was gonna move in with her give my only apartment up and support her so she wasn't alone. This all happened by January 2023 and I've been here since. Its taken a toll on me and I've recently gotten more worse with how my feelings are and my stress levels are through the roof i can never stop stressing or worrying or when I'm left alone I instantly start freaking out. I know something is wrong with me but I am unable to be checked in my country as men over 21 can no longer get help from where I am. Not sure about anyone else but I'm worser than ever and my health is also deteriorating at 23 years old too. So I just thought id share my life experience so far. 
rogan profile picture
Not important
by rogan
Last post
December 6th
...See more My boyfriend never tells me when any major thing happens in his life, and then because a major thing is happening I can’t be annoyed about it obviously because he’s got bigger things happening- but it feels like being punched in the chest that I’m not a priority in his life. We live together- and yet he doesn’t tell me when MAJOR life thing happens and he’s done it multiple times i just need to vent about it
Luciddreamsicle profile picture
“You’re so strong.”
by Luciddreamsicle
Last post
December 5th
...See more I’m tired of being told how strong, resilient, and un breakable I am. I’m exhausted. I don’t want to be strong. I want to melt into the arms of someone deeply concerned for my well being. I want to be checked on. I want someone to call me and say “hey, are you okay, why have you been radio silent?” I’ve been conditioned from a young age to never ask for help, so much that the very thought of doing so paralyses me with fear.
narutoo profile picture
Should I leave him?
by narutoo
Last post
December 3rd
...See more I am with this huys who has some anger issue and is a little inconsiderate. Earlier whenever I was not happy about something, like him not making efforts, I would tell him clearly that this is what I want. He would always get angry. Then I somehow made him understand that this behaviour of his is not acceptable and it scares me. Be said he won't do it again and the frequency reduced. After that, if I would bring up something, he would say calmly that ok he will fix it and all. Then on my birthday I asked him to plan something, but he didn't. I was very disaappointed and went silent. He realised the next day and asked me if I want to go somewhere. We made multiple plans but he himself started complaining like it's too sunny, it's too far. I told him ok whatever you want and then he again reacted very angrily. He started pakcing his stuff but I got to know he didn't have a place to go. So I hid his bag and asked him to sit and talk respectfully and then he can do whatever he wants. But the fight escalated, we both started badmouthing. He was continuously asking for his bag and i didnt give it to him. Then he started throwing stuff and all. I gave him his bag and he left. Later he messaged my flatmate that he loves me and all but whatever he do, it's never enough and is she 16 that she wants balloons kn her birthday. My flatmate told her how he reacted is not acceptable. I am very unsure about him now. Not sure if I should go back to him or not. Please help.
Srishti09shaw profile picture
The things we don’t tell other people.
by Srishti09shaw
Last post
December 2nd
...See more There are memories inside us that cage us, and we sit there with hopeful eyes that someone will come some day and unlock that cage. And when they do come, they tighten up the locks and you rot inside until you cannot breathe anymore.
Guardian23 profile picture
The perfect song does not exi-
by Guardian23
Last post
November 30th
...See more Hey beautiful people of the 7 cups universe!🥰 You guys have probably heard this song called Like you by Tatiana Manaois, but how many of you have realllllllly listened to the lyrics. I'm going to take a huge risk here and declare it the most perfect song in the world!  Don't believe me, let me share just a portion of the lyrics. To any members reading this, in the words of Tatiana herself: "You got to get up You got to get up and make a move 'Cause the world will never see you until you do No, they don't really care what you're going through So you got to show them, baby You got to show them the real you You got to give them what you've got No, don't let them see what you're not" She the goes on to sing: "Cause you are strong, you are wise You are worth beyond the thousand reasons why And you can't be perfect, baby 'Cause nobody's perfect, darling But, no, no, no, there's nobody in the world like 🌟YOU🌟. 🥺Literally so perfect. Listen to the song and let me know what verse really spoke to you. Okay, love you! BYE!!❤️🫶🏾

20 & Over Community


Welcome to the 20 & Over Community! This is a safe, inclusive and supportive place for you to share everything and anything related to life as a 20 and over individual.


What are the different forum topics for the 20 & Over?

20+ Issues: A place for you to discuss the issues you face as a 20+ individual.

Community Space: A place for icebreakers, introductions, discussions and community check-ins.


How can I help?

You can help us by simply responding to threads and sharing your story (if you're comfortable). Check-in with us, join a discussion, or start one! Alternatively, you can join us as a Forum Leader. Check out this thread for more information.


Helpful Threads

Taglist: Do you want to stay up to date with our community? Then join our tag list to be notified whenever there is a new discussion or update within the community!


20 & Over Community FAQ

Q: Are there any sub-community-specific guidelines that we need to adhere to?

A: You can find Sub-community-specific guidelines below, which you should follow in addition to the general forum guidelines.


Help! I still have a question!  If you need help, feel free to contact a community leader or post here, and someone will contact you!