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nonnyzolo
1,176 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 55 Compassion hearts34 Forum posts14 Forum upvotes20 Current upvotes20 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2024 Member sinceOctober 16, 2019
Recent forum posts
I get to close to people and then I get hurt.
Anxiety Support / by nonnyzolo
Last post
 May 27th, 2020
...See more I don't know what to do. I feel lost and scared with no sense of direction or safety. I made a huge mistake, I think. I went through a really hard time, and no one was there for me, but one day my school counselor called me in to talk to her. I do not like talking about my emotions. And when I do, it has to be with someone close to me. Well, it took me a while to get used to her (the school counselor), but once I did it was very comfortable and I found myself going to her about lots of things. But because of Covid I haven't been able to talk to her as much because my school is shut down. Now it's summer break, so I feel like I'm not allowed to email her. I feel like I made a mistake because I think I may have made a deeper bond with her than I should have. I know I'm supposed to go to her for emotions and stuff, but I can't help missing her a lot. She felt almost like a second mother to me. But the thing is, I have a hard time making ties with anyone, because I always go to deep or get too attached so I seperate myself because I'm scared of being hurt even though I'm kind of hurting myself. So then I'm fake around other people and I'm sad because I can't just be myself. Of course, there are other reasons I seperate myself, but this is one that's been bothering me lately. I don't know why I get so attached to people and then get hurt when they don't feel the same way or when they don't want to be friends anymore. So if anyone has any ideas that I could try or if they think maybe I have a disorder (idk if there's even a disorder for this) I'd like to know. Oh yeah! One more reason this bothers me is because I'm too afraid to go to a therapist/counselor in the community, even though I need to because of some other mental health concerns. Anyway, I just don't really know what to do.
I'm drowning. I'm defeated
Anxiety Support / by nonnyzolo
Last post
 May 16th, 2020
...See more Im so scared all the time and Im always worrying. I lie awake at night with a million thoughts running through my head. I want to just quit. Everything is so hard right now. My grades are going down and my mom wants me to get a job during the summer, but the training is so hard. Im always doubting myself too. I just get scared about literally everything even if it doesnt matter. And when things get too overwhelming, I shut down mentally. Well, with the training and school and everything, I feel like Im about to shut down. Its all just too much and I just want to relax, but Im getting up early and going to bed late and constantly worrying. Im drowning. I feel like I need to be constantly happy and get all my stuff done with no problems, but Im always one step behind everyone else if not more. Im so tired! I dont want to do this anymore but I get to scared to tell anyone how I feel!! Everything just seems so hard. All my problems seem so pathetic and I don't know why I'm constantly feeling this way. For some reason I get so angry about everything and then I'm just sad and I just go down, down, down......... Im defeated.
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