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Kodachrome73
4,883 M Seeking Light 7
PathStep 81 Compassion hearts444 Forum posts17 Forum upvotes24 Current upvotes24 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2020 Member sinceDecember 26, 2015
Bio
Canadian. Mid-20s. Genderqueer, Masculine-leaning, non-binary, jazz babe. I've been dealing with depression, anxiety, ADHD, emotional disregulation, & rejection sensitive dysphoria my whole life. I'm an abuse survivor as well and am also dealing with Complex-PTSD as a result. Trying to have more gratitude & be more mindful. Some of my interests include: animals, nature, art, dance, music, early & silent film, and musicals.
Recent forum posts
I lost the best therapist of my life almost a month ago & I'm still really upset.
Depression Support / by Kodachrome73
Last post
 August 25th, 2017
...See more About a month ago, my therapist had to unexpectedly quit and move to a new place, which I cannot follow her to. She was very dear to my heart and honestly it feels like she died. I'm literally grieving. I'm a little better now but I still get depressed about it and kick myself for having such a good rapport with her even though she helped me so much. I haven't seen my new therapist yet and I'm worried about having a really good rapport with her too because I don't want to fall apart all over again when she leaves. I have major abandonment issues and a lot of trouble letting people in and her leaving almost feels like a betrayal in some ways. I know she couldn't help the situation and she definitely hates that she had to leave but it still just hurts so much. I'm out of town and won't be able to see my new therapist (or my cat! 😖) for about another week and a half. I just hate that I became so attached to her and depended on her because that's one of my biggest issues and I feel like it's such a hindrance to my recovery. I relapsed for the first time in 6 months after she left and my anxiety, depression, self-harm urges & suicidal thoughts have all gotten worse. I know this is temporary and I can recover from this too but, honestly, that sounds so hollow to me right now. I just feel so lost and broken. 💔
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