What is the best way to deal with a situation when you find yourself triggered?

I used to be a self harmer for years...But then I stopped because of my husband who had forced me to quit but that doesn't mean I don't have triggers or urges now and then...How I personally deal with it is I tell myself that everything is okay that this too shall pass and that I can let myself just relapse after all of these years..and that I have to be here for my husband. Someone I love made it so that I could quit and it's what keeps me from going back to my old ways...

To think positive, calm down and breathe and to keep going. Walk away fr0m what got you triggered if you can.

Take a deep breath, step out of the situation mentally, and think! Think about all the positives that would come if you managed to deal with the trigger. Either way, make sure you praise yourself as you can notice your own personal triggers!

When triggered, you should remind yourself to take care of yourself. You know what's best for you. Try to get yourself calm by focusing on your breathing, lying down or sitting down and only focus on your breathing pattern. Maybe drink some water and tell yourself that it is gonna be okay, because it will be. If you can't seem to get yourself calmed down, maybe try to ask for help from someone near you. For example a friend, a parent, brother/sister or anyone you feel comfortable with.

According to my experience is the best to recognize and validate your feelings and emotions (I feel angry, sad, disappointed, etc. for example, and these feelings are all ok, normal and valid. Then you can try to find which were your thoughts which triggered your feelings and emotions (our thoughts are triggering our feelings and emotions, not situations). Then find out which thinking fallacy triggered your thinking and then do cognitive restructuring. Try to find less extreme, less intense, less provocative thoughts about situation which will enable you to feel less triggered and to calm yourself down. Ask yourself which proofs do you have that your thinking is 100 % correct, which proofs are against your thinking, etc. You can add also breathing exercises to help you calm down.

Excuse yourself from the situation. Most people will understand if you explain and the mental stress is not worth sticking it out, so please, if at all possible, take a break for a few minutes. I also keep things like scent sticks and fidget toys on my person in case there is a situation where I can’t leave. Scent sticks and essential oils are actually quite helpful, I’ve found, just buy a handkerchief and rub one of the two on it. If you find yourself in a triggering situation, you can take the handkerchief out and pretend you’re blowing your nose. Often those scents are quite useful in temporarily calming me down if I need to stay in a stressful situation for longer than I’d like