I managed to stop self-harming, but then I relapsed, how can I ever stop for good?

I honestly don't know. I've done the same. I can't find the strong will to throw my razors away. I need an inspiration to stop. I think that's what everyone needs that is in this situation, a reason to quit.

Self-harm can become addictive. It may start off as an impulse or something you do to feel more in control, but soon it feels like the cutting or self-harming is controlling you. It often turns into a compulsive behaviour that seems impossible to stop. Self-harm is a way of expressing and dealing with deep distress and emotional pain. As counterintuitive as it may sound to those on the outside, hurting yourself makes you feel better. In fact, you may feel like you have no choice. Injuring yourself is the only way you know how to cope with feelings like sadness, self-loathing, emptiness, guilt, and rage. The problem is that the relief that comes from self-harming doesn’t last very long. It’s like slapping on a Band-Aid when what you really need are stitches. It may temporarily stop the bleeding, but it doesn’t fix the underlying injury. And it also creates its own problems. If you’re like most people who self-injure, you try to keep what you’re doing secret. Maybe you feel ashamed or maybe you just think that no one would understand. But hiding who you are and what you feel is a heavy burden. Ultimately, the secrecy and guilt affects your relationships with your friends and family members and the way you feel about yourself. It can make you feel even more lonely, worthless, and trapped. Talking about self-harm can be very stressful and bring up a lot of emotions. Don’t be discouraged if the situation feels worse for a short time right after sharing your secret. It’s uncomfortable to confront and change long-standing habits. But once you get past these initial challenges, you’ll start to feel better. Remember, self-harm is most often a way of dealing with emotional pain. What feelings make you want to cut or hurt yourself? Sadness? Anger? Shame? Loneliness? Guilt? Emptiness? Once you learn to recognize the feelings that trigger your need to self-injure, you can start developing healthier alternatives. •Paint, draw, or scribble on a big piece of paper with red ink or paint •Express your feelings in a journal •Compose a poem or song to say what you feel •Write down any negative feelings and then rip the paper up •Listen to music that expresses what you’re feeling •Take a bath or hot shower •Pet or cuddle with a dog or cat •Wrap yourself in a warm blanket •Massage your neck, hands, and feet •Listen to calming music •Call a friend (you don’t have to talk about self-harm) •Take a cold shower •Hold an ice cube in the crook of your arm or leg •Chew something with a very strong taste, like chili peppers, peppermint, or a grapefruit peel. •Go online to a self-help website, chat room, or message board •Exercise vigorously—run, dance, jump rope, or hit a punching bag •Punch a cushion or mattress or scream into your pillow •Squeeze a stress ball or squish Play-Doh or clay •Rip something up (sheets of paper, a magazine) •Make some noise (play an instrument, bang on pots and pans) •Use a red felt tip pen to mark where you might usually cut •Rub ice across your skin where you might usually cut •Put rubber bands on wrists, arms, or legs and snap them instead of cutting or hitting

Relapses are part of recovery, just keep trying and you will recover. Things might be hard, but things ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS get better.

It sounds like you have already had success in the past, congratulations. From what your telling me, you already have the skills to stop self-harming. What did you use before?

The best way of doing that is finding an alternative way to release your pain. You can find things that make that urge to cut go away, for instance you can run or you can jump or just draw something or call your friends, anything that does not involve you getting hurt

It's just like it is when recovering from any addiction: one day at a time. Instead of focusing on how long you will remain clean, try focusing on the accomplishment that is making it through today, that stressful paper, that fight with your friend. Just focus on little victories, and eventually you'll start noticing that they are becoming bigger victories.

I would say try to remove all things you have self harmed with and instead of cutting you could draw on the area you cut/burn/scratch/etc. So instead of seeing painful scars you can see a beautfiul masterpiece ^w^

Find another way to take that pain away. There's a lot of things you can try, like art, make art, draw, paint, write what you feel, let it out.

I think the best way is to get a stable support system and get professional help. The professionals can teach you the right way and how to keep away from it. Support will be very helpful during that time too.

The road to recovery is twisty, windy, and more like a backroad--it unfortunately is not a clear path. Relapse is usually a part of this journey. Have a plan for when this happens--talk to a loved one, make yourself some chamomile tea, journal, or take a walk. Just because there is a relapse does not mean that you can't stop for good. You are absolutely worth taking that windy, twisty path. Seven Cups is also here for you, if you need additional support!