I have lied to my wife several times to avoid conflict. How do I break this cycle?

It kinda depends on your wife (that is, if you want to truly break the cycle I mean). What I see is needed from your part, is that you come out honestly (or courageously, to be more precise), and admit to her first that you are fearful of conflicts with her if you behave naturally. That's the starting point as I see it. Your natural behavior and your experience with her tell you that a conflict is very possible if you let these 2 interact. This anticipation and your past emotional experience with her (past conflicts) create fear, proportionally with the intensity of emotional stress or pain you felt in the past. After this subject is brought into the light, and you both have a healthy discussion about it, then everything becomes possible and easier afterwards. But, here comes her choice, because she has a choice in the matter, that you cannot control. I don't know what she wants, but she can want only 2 things. She either wants to keep her strategy to use conflict as a way to control your behavior ("if you don't behave, I will yell, and we will fight!", like a blackmail). Or, she wants more honesty, and she is open to work her control and fix issues together with you, and that's great then. If she chooses to keep using the conflict as blackmail, then you have to keep your ground also, or else, you will compromise yourself for her, and that's always BAD for the future of the relationship. If there's an invisible inherent conflict between you two, it's better to at least protect your integrity, you know? to keep your standards intact as much as possible. Anyway, first thing first, come into the open with your fear of conflict with her, admit it, and open the subject when you both have time to focus on the subject. That's the first step, as I see it.