Why do I have an anxiety about planning to become a parent even though I'm in a stable relationship?
Chloeboo
on
Jul 23, 2015
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It's completely normal to feel anxious about becoming a parent. It's a normal human emotion to be worried or scared about things that are unknown to us, and in fact shows what a great parent you will be. It's a worry that affects everyone, even those in stable relationships, those who are emotionally and financially secure, most people never truly feel "ready" and have many fears, but it has no bearing whatsoever on the kind of parent you will be or how you will adapt to your new life with a baby. When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter I was terrified! I confided in my Midwife, who told me she became a midwife before having her children, and even she, as a trained midwife who knew all there was to know about pregnancy, birth and babies still felt very scared and daunted herself. It's a completely natural way to feel. I was so scared when I was pregnant I would often cry about it. I had zero experience with babies and worried a lot about the birth and being a mother, but the moment my daughter was born all my worries went away. Talking to friends and relatives may help with this, and if you do become pregnant don't hesitate to confide in your midwife or doctor, but know you are very much no alone in feeling this way.
Anonymous
on
Feb 19, 2015
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Because you care! Planning to have and raise a tiny human is a big commitment, and when you care a lot-that can create anxiety around it. There are a lot of societal and cultural pressures as well that can influence how we feel about becoming a parent and raising kids. The important thing to know, is that being a loving, supportive and caring parent is the most important thing. Sure, you'll mess some things up (and your kid will mess LOTS of things up...literally), but what they need from you is your love-to know that you are in it with them for the long-haul. Kids need that more than cheerios, Dora, or the latest iPhone.
Anonymous
on
May 14, 2015
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Having a child is a big decision and a big life change. The anxiety is because you recognize that. If you have the support of your partner, there's nothing to worry about!
peacefulMoment24
on
Jun 14, 2015
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Even though you are in a stable relationship or environment, it still is scary because of the unknown. When you know something, we don't get as much anxiety, but when the unknown surfaces, it becomes a bumpy and scary ride.
PatientOwl
on
Jul 12, 2016
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Becoming a parent is a huge, huge thing. It changes your whole life and can seem overwhelming and daunting at times. Just remember that you're never alone, there are lots of people going through the same as you. Most of us are winging it and have no idea what we're doing most of the time. Everyone messes up sometimes, just remember there's no such thing as a perfect parent
Anonymous
on
Apr 28, 2015
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Parenthood is a lifelong commitment. Go into it with all your heart or not at all. This is the only way to succeed.
grumpymama
on
Feb 20, 2016
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Anxiety about planning a family is perfectly normal! It is a huge step in life where you go from being a single person to having a family (even if you're married). That little baby that will melt your heart will cause you anxiety the rest of your life, and in my experience, I pay it gladly.
RJordan
on
Jul 5, 2016
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I don't personally think that any responsible adult is fully ready and anxiety free when it comes to children. Raising kids is such an important and impactful responsibility, no matter where people are in their parenting journey, there will be anxieties. It might be helpful to talk to your partner about your feelings and theirs. Also it's important to remember that not every adult in a relationship becomes a parent, and it's perfectly fine to never have children.
timberland
on
Aug 16, 2016
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I'm sure every parent feels like this at some point. just the idea of having a life you are responsible for is jittery. Keep in mind that you have a loving partner to help you along with it
Anonymous
on
Jun 11, 2019
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you often feel this way since you’re stepping into another chapter of your life and it can become scary. being a parent is a whole different responsibility. it can make you think if you’re doing everything right or if you’re doing anything wrong but really, it shouldnt be that scary. being a parent is of course tough but you were meant to be a parent for a reason and you should never think that you’re doing something wrong ON PURPOSE. you could do something wrong on accident, but a mistake or
two mistakes or even more than 5
mistakes, those mistakes dont define who you are or who you have become. those mistakes only push you to become a better parent and to become a better person. if anything, those mistakes can help you to learn! learn what you didnt already know, and making mistakes as a parent, i know is tough, but its life and its how life works. being a parent is just another step into opening up a new and great and amazing chapter of your life!
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