I'm scared of becoming the kind of parent my parents were, how do I avoid it?

You can look at their parenting skills, take best bits or you can do the opposite of them. You must listen to your inner self/instinct. Sometimes the child teaches the parent.

Your parents are your first example for everything from love to friendship to personality and more. However, as your grow and learn and are inspired and influenced by other people, places, and things, you have an opportunity to become whatever it is that you desire. You may have to work harder at it because of your past but that only build character and deserves respect. Take from the good that they gave you and you are in charge of creating the rest. Let the bad be an example of what not to do and move forward towards your parenting goals.

It helps to identify exactly what you disliked about your parents. Maybe make a list of all the things that you feel were unhelpful to you as a child and then write out how you will prevent yourself from doing this to your own child. For example, if your parents yelled a lot about everything you could talk to a counsellor about how to manage your anger and stress. If your parents invaded your privacy you could research ways to facilitate healthy communication between you and your child.

Look at your parents as an example - a bad example. Evaluate what they did wrong and see if you can find similarities in your actions. Look at how you can build a supportive environment and seek help from others to maintain it. Be conscious of your actions and communicate with your children

Learn from what your parents have done wrong and be better. You are not your parents so you can be better. Believe that you can is the most important 1st step.

Well, I made a list of positive and negative things my parents did. Once I did that, I'd refer to it and make sure I followed the positives not negatives. I also read about of a parenting book by Rebecca Eanes. I know you'll do great! -Alex

This was always my fear too, more specifically that I would become my dad. Your personality is part genetic but only partially and you can override it. I am proof of that. By my age my father had cheated on my mother more times than he could remember and was a compulsive liar. I have been faithfully married for quite some time and tend to be "brutally" honest, avoiding even white lies. Its all about self control, being aware of yourself and your behaviour, and thinking before you act. Your partner will also be very important in this, talk to them and be clear and agreeable about how you plan to raise your child together.

Some things are out of our control no matter how much you may try to prevent it. Just make sure you become the best parent you can be.

Well, first you should recognize what you're parents did, that you dont want to do. Then perhaps you should set steps or a plan to make sure that it doesn't happen.

Because you are scared enough and aware enough to recognize their failures and focus your energies on exploring and researching good parenting techniques. Put the new teaching into practice in your family.