Why do I compare everyone to my bad relationship?
138 Answers
Moderated by Maria Wasielewski, Master of Arts in Counseling and Guidance, University of Arizona
Updated: Jun 2, 2022
Inesa707
on
Oct 22, 2017
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Your bad relationship had a dramatic effect on you. It's in the back of your mind as it was bad, and you fear having another bad relationship, hence the comparison. Youre looking for things or signs that match the bad relationship so you can get out quick and not get hurt. You need to relax and remember everyone is different, even tho they may seem the same as your bad relationship, they arent.
svxo23
on
Nov 20, 2017
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Because the grass is alays greener on the other side. You don't know what happens behind closed doors, water and nurture your grass before bringing it to competition.
Anonymous
on
Dec 22, 2017
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The relationship may still be a large part of your life, whether you realise it or not. That's the main reason any of us bring things up.
dogmom99
on
Dec 30, 2017
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You see traits in everyone. From my point of view you have seen these traits before from the bad relationship so when you see it in other people it reminds you of that.
Anonymous
on
Jan 7, 2018
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We are social creatures and hardwired to compare our situation against our perception of how other people are functioning. Since finding a compatible partner is a fundamental driving force in life we tend to think and worry about this aspect of our lives a great deal. That inevitably leads to comparisons.
Anonymous
on
Jan 10, 2018
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You may compare everyone to your bad relationship is because you may not want the same situation happen between you and someone else anymore so you compare them and avoid them at times.
auditrice
on
Jan 14, 2018
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This is very natural, at some point or the other we all face it. Its like once heart broken or our trust is broken our mind is trying to protect us from same kind of hurtful feelings happen again. Things become alright by and by so don't be hard on yourself.
Anonymous
on
Jan 26, 2018
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Possibly out of fear of the same events reoccurring in your life. Not everyone is going to be that person who hurt you. Stay guarded but don't forget not everyone wants to hurt you.
Anonymous
on
Feb 21, 2018
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This is actually really common. People tend to compare others to a bad relationship so that they might prepare themselves if those other relationships might go the same way. It is not healthy to compare everyone to bad relationships as they are not the same as that "bad" in your relationship. It is normal to be cautious, but not healthy to let it rule you.
Anonymous
on
Feb 22, 2018
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You do this because you know people that remind you of your relationship and it makes you feel worse.
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