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Is it normal to constantly be thinking about how you should behave instead of acting naturally?

Profile: GlenM
GlenM on Jun 13, 2016
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Very good question! I think a good way to think of this is to consider it as existing along a spectrum. When people are nervous about things or a little anxious they tend to self-monitor more. When people are more relaxed or doing something they are good at then they self-monitor less. People that struggle with social anxiety sometimes do a lot of self-monitoring. People that don't tend to worry around other people may experience during public speaking. The good news is that exposure to social situations, practice interacting, and realizing that often what we worry about doesn't actually happen 96% of the time can help us learn to monitor less and relax more.
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Profile: WemsCodes
WemsCodes on Apr 25, 2015
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I think that it's common especially for people who tend to overthink. It's the biggest cause for social anxiety, and goes hand in hand with people who are more introverted. Being a computer scientist, my course has a lot of people who do this, including myself. Finding people who think the same way helped me to open up, and to be able to relax around people. You don't have to be a social butterfly and immediately get along with everyone you meet. Finding close friends who you are comfortable with is more important, and the more time you spend with them, the more you relax and are able to just be yourself. Learning to combat overthinking is something that develops over time, just remember to value your close friends - it's all about quality and not quantity :)
Profile: furrylittlefox
furrylittlefox on Apr 24, 2017
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is it normal? yes. but do you have to live with it? no. when we live inside of our heads there's a strong mental focus and anxiousness even. when we do this we are not focused on living in the now but focused on what will be perceived by others in the future from the now. you can see this strongly for example of saying someone going on a blind date. they don't know who it'll be, what kind of person this is, or if they will like them or vice versa. so they can become anxious wondering "what kind of vibe am i giving off?" "am i being normal or weird?" "am i sitting properly or sluggishly?" "maybe i should of went with the blue shirt instead of red" within this scenario this person is nor focused on the now but only focus on how they are coming off versus being who they actually are.
Profile: enlightenedmagic45
enlightenedmagic45 on Jan 10, 2017
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It is totally normal to be concerned about behaving appropriately in any given situation, and it is also totally normal to be concerned about how others may perceive your actions. There is a balance that each person must find between appeasing others and appeasing yourself with your own actions.
Profile: KevBer85
KevBer85 on Nov 10, 2015
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If you inhibit yourself everyday that is limiting your character, and not showing that you have a personality. Thinking about how you behave should be the common sense aspect of being at work or in a public place. Beyond that you should be free to be who you are.
Profile: goleft
goleft on Oct 3, 2016
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This is a normal habit which is often consistent with social anxiety. If you are feeling anxious or self-conscious, it can really help to speak with a professional to work through these thoughts. You can also look through the 7 Cups of Tea Self-Help Guides at http://www.7cups.com/supportGuides/selfHelpGuides.php.
Profile: April1968
April1968 on Aug 14, 2018
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I feel society has conditioned us to behave a certain way which ultimately hinders a persons uniqueness
Profile: frostyMoon72
frostyMoon72 on Apr 4, 2015
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it is not necessarily abnormal but sometimes if you think about how you are acting to much you become insecure and it takes you down the wrong path
Profile: scarlet25
scarlet25 on Aug 3, 2015
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It is normal to over think at times, but over thinking about how to behave does not always help. Sometimes while we are busy being conscious of our behaviour we miss out the small important things. Once a while, just try acting naturally, do the crazy idea that comes into your mind, don't think what will happen if you behave like that just do it. Sometimes being instant helps.
Profile: AstralShadow
AstralShadow on Mar 7, 2016
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in this age of society, I supppose its "normal" But dont dwell on it. be WHO YOU want to be. YOU are the one living IN THAT body. No one else. Think about things that will make you happy instead! that is really important as well as being nice and respectful as well. (nice person and all that) :)
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