I can't get angry at the people I care about, is there something wrong with me?

Oh honey no. Sometimes, it's just not in our nature to get angry especially with the people we care about. I'm no expert, but it could be because subconsciously, we're afraid to hurt them or offend them. And it's perfectly fine. But do not for a second think there's something wrong with you. Look at it this way, you have got too big of a heart to get angry with people. That only makes you a wonderful spirit. I am sure, that you are indeed an amazing person. But if you feel you're burying your feelings, don't hesitate to reach out and rant. RANTING is like chicken soup for the soul. Love you beau. Have a wonderful day.

I think getting angry is a normal emotion. It is often an indicator that we need to do something. When we are angry we can feel like a boundary is being stepped on or that we are being treated in an unfair way. Everyone is entitled to their feelings and should be able to express them in a healthy way. Sometimes, we can look at our anger in a different way that points us in a healing direction. For example, mom washes the laundry and throws all her son's socks on his bed in a pile. The son comes home from school, and without looking, sits on the pile and experiencing the uncomfortable situation of sitting on a lump in the middle of his bed. He could walk around breathing hard, slamming doors, and the like, which upsets everyone in the house. He could also say to himself, "I am angry when my mom dumps all these socks on my bed. What can I do?" He shifts his thinking for problem solving, instead of exploding. He then could take a few different courses of action. What would some of the things he could do in this situation be?

The brain has a number of coping mechanisms it develops to handle the overwhelming emotions that follow trauma. One of them is "numbing," or dissociation. Now it is important to clarify if you are feeling anger but not being able to express it, or if you are not feeling anger at all. This protective phenomenon may be what is preventing you from feeling anger towards those you care about. In childhood, it may have been dangerous to express anger because it would lead to more abuse. Was this the case? If so, then you may want to look into trauma-informed clinical counseling with a focus on internal family systems and dissociative disorders.

No, nothing is wrong with you. It's just that being good at expressing emotions, especially negative ones, often takes practice. Don't stress out and take one small step at a time. Practicing saying "no" to others helped me out a lot, no matter how trivial the matter is. Something like, "do you want chocolate ice cream?" "No, I want strawberry." These little practices really do help a lot, and when the big moment comes, you will be able to express yourself properly. Also, remind yourself that yelling and throwing things around are not the only ways to get angry at someone. Everyone has their own way of expressing anger.

I might suggest you replace the mindset of "what's wrong with me" with "what happened to me?". I had this exact same problem for years until I realized that, due to my complex childhood trauma, I couldn't get angry in fear of being too much like my mother. It wasn't that anything was wrong with me, but it was what happened TO me that caused me to behave in that particular way. There are many people who may not have any trauma, but feel as though being unkind in an already seemingly unkind world is the wrong thing to do. While that is correct and I applaud you for that, it's also essential to be able to stand up for yourself if you need with the people you care about.

Firstly, there is nothing wrong with your concern. When we care about people we always have the tendency to see the good in them at all times but it is important for us to also recognise the bad things too, especially when we feel uncomfortable ourselves and do not set boundaries to ensure a healthy relationship is maintained. Finding the opportunity to acknowledge the problem and then talking things through with them sets clear goals for the people around you and yourself and helping you to prevent any further misunderstandings or unwanted resentment; communication is key to setting boundaries, even with the people you care dearly for the most.