How can I learn to control my emotions when I don't even know what they are?

write things down. seriously, just write every feeling/word/happening down. it doesn't have to be a fluent sentence or story. maybe just single words and little drawings. maybe if it's all written down you see a pattern. but feelings don't have to have a label to exist.

I find taking an internal step back for a short moment, letting my attention to settle on my breathing or sensations in the body is the first part of the process. When I'm not sure what I'm feeling, I find that I'm usually caught up in my thoughts, perhaps even swept away by them. Once my attention is more embodied, I let myself feel whatever emotion is present in a nonjudgemental way, as if I'm being there for a friend or a child. I don't have to name feelings, I just let them be without acting on them. At their core, I think feelings usually have a message so I try to find out what that message is too.

In therapy I have been learning a lot about identifying certain emotions and giving them a name. It is possible to get to the point where you can identify them, through association. You can associate certain things or phrases with those feelings. Also, thinking out loud helps. You can (and I do this a lot) say out loud what is going on in your head to help pinpoint what the emotions are. Eventually when you're able to identify, you can control them by acknowledging their existence, and going about whatever coping strategy works best for you.

Try to take a deep breath and explore what is really bothering you. If that seems too difficult at the moment, then distract yourself and then come back to it at a later time. Once you deal with the issue, you can learn to control it

The simplest way is to calm down, breathe, relax and think. Doing this releases stress from the brain and calms the nerves of the body down so that the body can think and act properly

Try to always think before "doing" and to county 10 seconds before blurting something out that may come out the wrong way.

Spend time with yourself. Try and identify the trigger which makes you feel what you feel now. The heart will answer in its time. You can also approach another person for help.

Possibly by writing down your feelings you are able to discern what kind of emotions you are getting. You are able to see what you are feeling and understand that you can make things better for yourself.

if you talk to a listener on the site about how you're feeling they may be able to help you identify what it is you're feeling, also feel free to check out the managing emotions self help guide on the site.

By understanding that everyone is always undergoing their own personal issues. Despite some things you hear being upsetting,it is important to keep a clear mind and communicate clearly with the person. By being there for them and letting them know you understand their feelings,you are helping them greatly.