Why is it that so many people who identify in a way that has attraction to the same gender end up falling for one of your best friends?

Great question. First of all, it's not just you. Straight people have this problem too! I think the reason is that physical attraction and emotional attraction are very closely related, and often we tend to be attracted to the people who are closest to us, regardless of their gender/sex or our self proclaimed sexuality. Fell for my best friend when I was fourteen. Luckily though, it can also work the other way: the person you fall in love with can become your best friend, and that's just awesome.

Attraction comes from feeling close to someone, one of these are geographic proximity, someone who you feel comfortable with and having spent significant time with can easily be a love interest.

I think, its because we know our best friends more. We have know about this person for a long time, his/her strengths and weaknesses and still prefer to stay with them. We don't need to pretend about anything, our feeling, our mood swings, they know us inside out and will be the first to know if something is wrong. We like that connection, that proximity. We fall for someone, if we get to know that , that person cares for us on a very deep level, irrespective of the fact, they show it or not. I think that the human soul wants someone to understand them and be there for them, just someone who believes in them. We crave that care and concern and if we get that in the form of our best friend, the human mind will subconsciously be attracted to that person irrespective of their gender.

Love is an emotion that humans developed so we could choose the best mate. Chances are, if you fall for your best friend, you already loved them in a platonic way before. You already wanted to spend your life with them, so your mind decided why not take it to a new step?

I'd say this is a misunderstood normative attraction. The #1 factor in being attracted to anyone, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, is proximity. That means we are more likely to be attracted to people that are closer to us in general. Think about how many office romances, best friends hooking up, teamates dating, neighbors being secret lovers, etc you might know. Why does anyone fall for people they know already? Because we know and trust them, oftentimes that's an imporatnt first step in loving someone. Hope that helps your understanding, cheers!

Oh boy. This brings back memories. For me, I thought I was straight. I thought that was how the world worked. I thought some boys were cute, but I shrugged it off as normal. Then I met Nik. Nik was my closest and dearest friend. He was the reason I figured out I was bi-sexual. I think it's because of the bond we establish with them. It's such a close and personal bond that you can't help but fall in love.

Maybe because they feel they are in a 'comfort zone' and don't have the confidence or strength to look further afield. A lot of people fall for people who are kind to them.

This is not a same-gender attraction issue. Straight people fall for their friend's best friends too. If someone is attracted to your best friend, it's not because they're gay or lesbian. It's because they're human.

It's not too much of a mystery when you consider that being close to someone and knowing them well can make it easier to be attracted to someone. Obviously you become friends with someone because you like them and enjoy being with them, and if you are attracted to the gender they are, it's easy to see why you'd also start liking them in a way more than just friends.

People open up to a select amount of people. Outside of family, friend groups are tight-kind and limited in terms of people. We join together with people we trust, and the people we have as friends often carry many traits we find attractive-this being the reason we are friends with them. Without a certain level of attraction, friendship is nothing. Add this to closeness and wholeness you might feel with a friend-who wouldn't love to have a romantic relationship with somebody they have no doubt that they can love, and be loved. Trust, and be accepted and valued for everything you're worth. Because before they were lovers, they were best friends. They know every detail of each other. They didn't skip straight to sex like many couples these days, rushing a relationship too quickly to say whether it's right or not. Best friends know that they're right for each other. Everything they do feels better with the other person. They work as a unit, as two halves of one extremely healthy relationship.