What's the best way to come out of the closet to your parents?
35 Answers
Moderated by Danielle Johnson, MSED, Community mental Health Counseling, LMHC
Updated: Apr 26, 2022
Gardeviola
on
Nov 7, 2014
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Like many things of this nature, it depends. If they are conservative or otherwise homophobic, you might want to wait until you're independent of them. On the other hand, if they seem to be accepting, you might just want to bring it up in a conversation. Start with the topic of it.
Emily619
on
Jul 28, 2015
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The best way to come out of the closet to your parents, if you are speaking in literal terms, is to become more comfortable and closer to them. If you're speaking figuratively, the same goes. Try telling a close friend, as this will help major.
Deadboy666
on
May 31, 2016
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Carefully is the best. Make sure you have a safe environment for if anything goes wrong. You can talk to your parents and text the waters about celebs or friends. You could write them a letter or just talk to them about it. If you feel like they are going to take it bad you may need to go stay at a friends for a night while they think about it. Some parents are great but some are bad when it comes to LGBT+ stuff
Anonymous
on
Dec 4, 2017
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The best way is your way, you can stand letter or speak, you can also make a video every way is a good way to do your coming out. Even if it's hard.
Aayla
on
Aug 27, 2019
LGBTQ+ Issues Expert
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You can express your feelings as openly as you can, tell them what it means to be who you are, how you realized you are LGBT, and reassure them that nothing changes in who you are as a person, you're still you though this part of your identity is different than they thought. Make sure they know you want to share it with them because they are important to you, and maybe tell them that you believe in your relationship and you're sure they know that nothing changes in the person you are. You can also encourage them to ask you any questions they have about it. Be patient, it's possible that they'll need more time to come to terms with it, but what truly matters is that they give you a chance to be listened and understood: that's a signal that they're willing to give you a chance. Ultimately, those who really love and care for you will accept you for who you are and they'll just want you to be happy, no prejudice can ruin real love! If you're feeling very uncomfortable, you can even consider writing a coming out letter.
ComfortablyCasual
on
Nov 20, 2018
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I do not believe there is a “better†or “worse†way to come out to parents, I think it depends on the person and what they happen to be comfortable with. I know for me I came out when I started to date a girl and I game out by telling them about my girlfriend. But I know other people who discovered that they weren’t straight and just came out in the moment. Some make big deals, other very nonchalant. I think it’s all up to what you feel comfortable with personally and what feels right. Just as sexuality fluctuates, I feel like the way we go about it can fluctuate too.
joyfulKat
on
Apr 26, 2022
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I think the best way to come out to your parents is to prepare yourself for questions they may ask and then sit them down and tell them whatever your sexual orientation is and try to be understanding with any questions they may ask since this is probably a shock to them. And let them know that this doesn’t change anything- you are still you. This conversation will probably be ongoing since they may try to educate themselves to better understand you. And hopefully all will be well and they will accept you. If not remember that there is nothing wrong with you and you have to be true to yourself.
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