I am very confused about my sexuality. How can I determine what my sexuality really is?
Breathedani
on
Jan 30, 2015
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I know it can be hard and you may truly want to label yourself this very second as gay, straight, bi, trans, whatever it may be really. But the truth is, you have to get to know yourself and this takes time. It doesn't happen over night and it takes a lot of patience. Currently I define myself as bisexual because I don't want to tell others I am a lesbian and then fall in love with a guy and then be "not allowed" to date him. Time will help you figure out who you really are :)
dancingPillow85
on
Mar 31, 2016
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Sexuality is unstable thing, it may change overtime. You don't need to put a label on yourself, just be with who you want to be. That's it.
SimplyBeing
on
Apr 9, 2016
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I spent years chasing my sexuality. Sometimes I chased it like a prize or Easter egg that when I opened it would make everything better. Other times I chased my sexuality like it was a thief had come in the night to steal all the good things I could get out of relationships while I was still in the closet. The hardest lesson I had to learn about my sexuality was to stop chasing it. I guess to let it get some rest and give myself space to think. I worry sometimes when others come to me and say I am confused about my sexuality and what they really are is scared. Scared of what it might mean to who they are, their relationships with friends and family, having children and a hundred other things that circle in our heads. The answer to how you can determine what you sexuality really is is both simple and hard to do. Still still with it. Acknowledge the feelings you have what ever they may be. Know that no feeling is forever and taking a step down on path or the other isn't final. It's okay to say "This is what I am now" or "I have feelings for _____. Without labeling yourself until you better understand it. It's your journey and the paths other people choose don't have to be yours. Treat yourself gently,
I wish you Peace,
J
Anonymous
on
Mar 3, 2016
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Try acting like both a boy and girl then see what one you like better. What do you feel comfortable acting like?
enlightenedRiver18
on
May 31, 2015
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Sometimes you can't put a label on things just by how you feel at the moment. Often you have to just go through your life, being with who you want- and then you can look back on it later and see a pattern, like if you've only really been with people of your own gender etc.
However, questions you can ask are "would I go out with a girl/boy", "would I have sex with a girl/boy", "am I attracted to anyone in that way", and so on.
Spiderman93
on
Aug 4, 2015
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you dont have to classify your sexuality if you are unsure of what to call yourself. there are many sites to better explain what different sexuality traits are and how to determine who you are. just be yourself and keep your head up. you will find yourself in time. :)
Angel80L
on
Feb 21, 2016
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first of all, don't stress if you can't put a label to it. If you like a person or a type of person, as long as you're happy then there's not much of a problem. if you still want to find a label, that's great! my first suggestion would be to work out what you know you like, so you can narrow down the terms you'll need to look through. Have a look online, read through terms, if you find a label that fits immediately, that's great! don't stress if you can't find one to describe exactly how you feel. A lot of the labels can be combined with other sexualities to be a more personal and in-depth name to put to a person. For example, I could choose to label myself as a pansexual demiromantic rather than just pansexual or just demi-romantic. I could choose to use bisexual instead of pansexual purely because it's a bigger and more well-known sexuality. Another thing to keep in mind is that it's perfectly normal to change your sexuality or your mind- this is you, and you change and grow like every other human on earth. It is very likely that you'll change your sexuality lots of times to fit you. Lastly- 1) sexuality is fluid. You can be bisexual and be 99.9% into girls but still identify as bisexual and 2) have fun with it. this is a new world to you. Enjoy the novelty of it.
Dannus
on
Apr 25, 2015
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I understand how this feels, the desire for someone just to say what sexuality you or i are, to make things easier. What i advise is take your time, there is no pressure to know if you are gay or straight, you will just know! I spent a lot of time in denial, trying to persuade myself that i was straight, and i dated a girl thinking i liked her in 'that way', but i didn't. i didn't like kissing her or holding her hand, seeing her was a chore. However one day my best friend, a guy, kissed me on the lips when i told him i thought i was gay, and in that moment i knew it was right, it felt magical. When i kiss guys, it feels right, tingly, magical, girls i don't feel this way. I hope this helps!
Vaux
on
Feb 20, 2016
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A good way of trying to determine your sexuality, from my experience, is thinking in the future. Would you marry a man, a woman, or wouldn't mind either? Would you spend the rest of your life with them, raise children, have sexual relations? What are you attracted to? That is how I figured out my sexuality. It will come in time, too.
sunshineSummer10
on
Mar 20, 2016
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Well you can try and ha e a relationship with the sex your confused about your sexual orientation with and if it feels right it is your sexual orientation:)
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