How do I tell my boyfriend that I am both pansexual and genderfluid? My family can't know as it will make the abuse worse. I don't think his parents will approve. IDK about him.

Hi. Since your family can't know about it. you can make sure that once you tell your boyfriend this, it won't reach your parents either via him or his parents (in case he tells his parents). Coming out can be really nerve-wrecking. You can try to consider if you want to know about his views on LGBTQ+ before you reveal it to him. Once you are completely sure about telling your boyfriend, you can do this any time you guys are talking. Once you are sure, any time is right time. You don't need to wait longer or for a right time, you can just do it whenever you feel like saying it. I wish you the best.