Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How do I know if I'm gay, lesbian, or bisexual?

Profile: KindredSpirit108
KindredSpirit108 on Aug 9, 2015
...read more
There is no one way to know if you are a member of the LGBT community, but the easiest way to know might be to pay attention to whom you are sexually attracted. If you are predominantly sexually attracted to people of the same sex, you might be gay or lesbian. If you are equally or nearly equally attracted to people of both sexes, you may be bisexual. Sexuality is a complex part of your identity and is composed of many factors. Don't feel any pressure to decide what your sexuality is before you are ready. Talk with people from a variety of different sexual orientations who are warm and welcoming to clarify how you feel about who you are. Keep in mind it is never wrong or bad to be who you truly are.
Struggling with LGBTQ+ Issues?
Find relief with 7 Cups online therapy.
Profile: DragonDuBose
DragonDuBose on Aug 14, 2015
...read more
There is no easy answer to this question, and yet at the same time it is a very simple question. Basically, if you find that you are attracted (sexually, romantically, etc.) to people of the same sex or gender as you, or to people of more than one sex or gender, then in all likelihood you are not straight. It's that simple. However, no one can tell you if you are gay or pan or any label. That's something that you have to discover for yourself, and it's something that may not be simple or even constant. Sexuality is fluid. I'm either pan or bi or queer depending on how I feel about the words on any given day. What does it mean practically? It means I am open to relationships with many types of people, and I accept that about myself. Accept yourself, love yourself, use labels if and only if they help you.
Profile: petrichor1
petrichor1 on Aug 14, 2015
...read more
Sometimes, I think labels are too much. If you find yourself being attracted to people of the same gender, then maybe take a moment to see who else you find yourself attracted to. If you find that labeling yourself causes more stress than comfort, then you aren't required to so. People can be attracted to whomever they find themselves attracted to, without having to defend those attractions.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Dec 19, 2015
...read more
its simple go with what your heart tells you
Profile: rainlove89
rainlove89 on Jan 13, 2016
...read more
I think I know that I am gay since, I was 3 or 5, you really don't know your different unless you were told so when every body starts to tease you, being gay, lesbian, or bisexual is a natural feeling, like your hair above your head . . . it grows naturally without you knowing it .
Profile: ThommyVSB
ThommyVSB on Jan 13, 2016
...read more
You don't have to be any of those things. All you have to be is comfortable with who you are and who you love. It doesn't matter who they are, what matters is that you love eachother.
Profile: Crest
Crest on Jan 14, 2016
...read more
Do you find yourself thinking, in either sexual or romantic context, about anything other than the opposite binary gender of yours? If yes, then it comes down to your own gender, the gender of the person(s) you're attracted to and from that you can draw a conclusion of one of the above. Gay refers to a guy attracted, either sexually or romantically, to guys. Lesbian refers to a girl attracted, either sexually or romantically, to girls. Bisexual refers to a person of either gender attracted, either sexually or romantically, to both binary genders.
Profile: Speakfromheart
Speakfromheart on Jan 14, 2016
...read more
Depends on who all you seem to be physically attracted to. Coz emotional attraction may lie at timesome.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 15, 2016
...read more
If you like having sex with only guys and you're a guy you're gay if you like having sex with a girl and you are a girl you're a lesbian if your like having sex with both you're bisexual. Simple as that.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 15, 2016
...read more
if you feel attraction to girls and guys then you are bisexual, if you are attracted to people of the same gender as you and only the same gender as you then you are either gay or lesbian :)
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 17, 2016
...read more
It's safe to say that experimenting is the best way to go! Just to see what you lie and don't like!
Profile: devilsOrchestra
devilsOrchestra on Jan 20, 2016
...read more
as a gay male myself I knew when I was attracted to men both mentally and physically and didn't feel this way about women. If you feel the sexually aroused by the same sex and the opposite sex your bisexual, if you just feel this way about the same sex you are gay/lesbian. Speak with a listener on here such as myself if you need to discuss it more.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 21, 2016
...read more
If you feel compelled to be with somebody of the same sex or of either sex, or if you have fantasies of such, you might be homosexual or bisexual. However, in the end, you decide what label to use.
Profile: Jazyjeff
Jazyjeff on Jan 21, 2016
...read more
A little self exploration could help, try out new things it might help, you don't really have to label yourself but if you want to go ahead
Profile: CallMeOllie
CallMeOllie on Jan 27, 2016
...read more
It is whatever your attraction is strongest towards if your bisexual then you will have equal attraction to both sexes where as a gay person will have an extremely strong attraction to men and a lesbian would have an extremely strong attraction to women
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Feb 10, 2016
...read more
You start to find out as the time passes, But you really need labels?, If you love someone it won't matter if they are the same sex or different. If you really want to know, you need to try going out with diferent people, experiment! It won't hurt you.
Profile: SummerStxrs
SummerStxrs on Feb 12, 2016
...read more
Sexuality is fluid, but it's always more assuring, knowing that there's a certain word for the way you're different from the “norm.” However, it can be a bit tricky to settle on a certain label. Many people question their sexuality and there's no age limit as to when someone may figure out if they're queer. The deciding factor that most people rely on, however, is what sex they orient towards. More specifically, what sex they are sexually attracted to. If a male is attracted to another male more often than he is to a female, he may be homosexual. However, if he is also attracted to females (there is no certain proportion of attraction to each sex; ex: NOT 50% attracted to males and 50% attracted to females), he may consider himself bisexual. The same may apply to women.
Profile: IchooseCats
IchooseCats on Nov 1, 2016
...read more
There's not a "method" to understand your sexuality. With time you'll be able to tell who you're attracted to and who you see yourself with in your future. Time is all it takes to know :)
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 16, 2018
...read more
Well it depends on who you're attracted to, but if you're struggling with identifying your sexual orientation, you can just wait, until things clear up and you're sure, it's perfectly fine to be confused about your sexuality. Eventually you'll experience attraction, and that'll answer your question.
Profile: raymaniii
raymaniii on Jun 23, 2020
...read more
When you have that first moment of questioning your sexuality, you may wonder what it means and what you should do about it. First up, you don’t have to do anything straight away. Take whatever time you need to work out what these feelings mean for you, your identity and your future. There’s no time limit, so hit pause and give yourself a break. You could take some time to look at other people’s experiences of discovering their sexuality. QLives has a great series of videos, and celebs like Troye Sivan have also shared videos on YouTube. It might help to read up on sexuality – it’s a broad spectrum of feelings and experiences, and is definitely not as black and white as some people might think. Settle in with a book or a movie that explores the lives of LGBTQIA+ young people. Types of sexuality People use a few common labels to identify their sexuality. Your sexuality isn’t defined by who you have sex with – it’s about how you feel and how you choose to identify yourself. The important thing is that you choose what label feels comfortable, or you choose no label at all. You might find, like many others have, that the label you choose changes over time. Straight/Heterosexual: Attracted mostly to people of the opposite sex or gender. Gay/Homosexual: Attracted mostly to people of the same sex or gender (refers to guys – and often to girls, too). Lesbian: Attracted mostly to people of the same sex or gender (refers to women). Bisexual: Attracted to more than 2 genders. Pansexual: Attracted to romantic and sexual partners of any gender, sex or sexual identity. (‘Pan’ means ‘all’.) Polysexual: Attracted to romantic and sexual partners of many but not all genders, sexes or sexual identities. (‘Poly’ means ‘many’.) Asexual: Not really sexually attracted to anyone. Some people also choose the labels ‘queer’ or ‘fluid’ as a way of expressing themselves by their own personal feelings. Your sexuality can be confusing Don’t worry if you aren't sure about your sexuality. Being young is a time for figuring out what works for you. Exploring and managing strong feelings is often part of the experience. Whatever is going on, questioning and exploring your sexual identity can be confusing and scary. You might be worried about how the people you love will react, or what it means for your future. It's important to remember that, while it might feel overwhelming, you’re more than capable of getting through this tough period – and it won’t last forever.
Share a Helpful Insight
Sharing helps others and its therapeutic for you.
0/150 Minimum Characters
0/75 Minimum Words