Why doesn't taking care of myself come naturally to me?

Humans aren't programmed knowing how to take care of themselves. No one knows what they're doing and no two people have exactly the same needs. Learning what you need to be happy and productive takes a lot of trial and error, but it's 100% worth it.

Caring for ourselves comes in many stages. Basic care includes brushing teeth, showering and making sure our clothes are clean and hair is brushed. Others go the extra mile and do their hair, make-up and accessorize every day! If neither of these come naturally to you, perhaps you are dealing with other overwhelming issues which make these less of a priority to you mentally. Schedule some time and set an alarm to care for yourself because it helps you mentally.

Self-care is a skill that, honestly speaking, needs to be learned. Not all of us are born with a guide on how to take care of ourselves, some life experiences may even guide us to the wrong side of the road. Rest assured that with some determination and self-awareness, the journey of self-care will become a second nature.

Sometimes we are programmed from childhood to ignore personal needs in lieu of making others around us happy and may even ‘run our blood to water’ to accomplish this. As a result, our awareness of self-care needs is minimal. On the other hand some people over indulge by constantly focusing on their needs. Both responses represent an imbalance and a need to learn how to regulate suitable self-care. One cap does not fit all as far as self care goes because we all have different needs. Appropriate self care involves an intentional lifestyle which is focused on ensuring that the withdrawals we exact from our self each day is balanced with the inputs we make. It is a personal regime which targets the different aspects of our being (social, emotional, physical, mental and spiritual), to keep us healthy and happy. Self-care is a learnt skill.

Taking care of yourself is hard for many people, and is often not what’s seemingly natural to do in difficult situations.

Not taking care of yourself can be a sign of depression. Lack of hygiene like showering brushing your teeth things of that nature could be signs of a lack of self-worth, which can stem from depressive tendencies. It is OK to feel this way but you have to realize this is a symptom of something else. Sleeping excessively not showering and not eating can all be signs of being depressed. Try to talk to someone on here or a therapist or even someone that you trust because there’s a reason you feel this way

Maybe you wasn't taught to put yourself first. There is something to do with your upbringing. If your family has taught you that putting yourself first is an act of selfish, probably it is easy for you to feel guilty about speaking out for yourself or even thinking about your physical(or emotional) limits in certain situations. In that case, congratulations! You have been raised to be a people pleaser. People-pleasers are good at giving instead of taking or preserving for themselves. It is not your fault that it is not natural for you to take care yourself first. But you are aware of it now. And you can start doing it today. Self-care is your priority now. Cultivate the habit.

Taking care of myself doesn't come naturally to myself because I am a helper. I have a big heart, I enjoy tending to others. I am on the journey of discovering my self love as I believe it is a lifelong journey. I am accepting the reality that in order to truly help others, I need to help myself first. It is hard for me to tend to myself first, as I am my worst critic. It is easier to beat myself up when I have done something wrong. I struggle with others view of me, when people are rejectful towards me I turn it inwardly. As this negative spiral I experience makes it very hard for me to connect within me and take care of myself.

Self-care, just like anything else, is a learned habit. It shouldn’t come naturally at first. In my experience, taking some time out of your day to practice self care (like doing something you enjoy, helps you relax) is a healthy, formed habit to care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. It should be something that refuels you, instead of takes from you. In time, practicing self care can improve your relationship with others, help you feel more energized, and less anxious. How to start? • stick to the basics. Over time you will find your own rhythm and routine. You will be able to implement more and identify more particular forms of self-care that work for you. • Self-care needs to be something you actively plan, rather than something that just happens. It is an active choice and you must treat it as such. By marking part of your day to practice self care, you are holding yourself accountable to do it. With these tips, I hope you can begin to understand that self care takes practice, and lots of it! Don’t worry if you try something and it doesn’t work for you, you can always seek out other ways to take care of yourself and find out what works for you.

I wasn't taught how to take care of myself. I was taught to tear myself down and settle for less than what I am giving. It may be a lack of self love as to why we cant take care of ourselves among other things. Its also possible that I had many enablers growing up. I find that I will just go without but then a loved one will see and then buy me groceries or pay for someone to clean the house rather than helping me to figure out how to take care of that myself.