What's it like to go No Contact with your entire family?

It's heaven. There are roughly six billion people on earth. Why waste precious life time with people treating you badly just because you're related to them? You deserve better. Actually, you deserve the best.

It is good and I feel a lot of relief but from time to time I have to grieve over sad days when I miss them and know I cant go back and I often feel so alone and I have to figure things out for myself. I m sad that they probably believe so many lies about me but I know that they are emotionally sick or personality disordered or dysfunctional and I cant afford to be brought down again as Ive been psychologically abused, scapegoated all my life....

I have been no contact with my family for over 30 years. My father was narcissistic and abusive after growing up a star athlete and coddled first son. He and my passive mother passed on very toxic traits to all of the 5 children. I was the scapegoat and spent my early years being attacked constantly and then acting out or living up to their expectations of me. I was ignored unless they needed an opportunity to make themselves feel superior and better. I consider myself a survivor and a fighter and I am so thankful that I could walk away from such chaos. My siblings contact me every once in a while. I have now completely shut them out as I realize through a lot of help that these contacts are simply a way to either get under my skin while reassuring them that I'm the awful one, or, the youngest sometimes contacts me for information she can pass on to the others. What's interesting is they never try to build a relationship. I was invisible to my family growing up unless there was the need to condemn someone. I got out of it, you can too. Be strong, let go, move on and find your core love family. You were probably more sensitive, but stronger than they were. You had the good sense to get the hell out of dodge. (My Christian family still believe my father's horrendous behavior was just fine.) My brother morphed into my father, actually he was groomed to be just him. He tries to hover me the most. It's been a journey, hard at times, but well worth the peace of mind. I have a stable marriage and family and friends abound. All Friends won't understand and that's okay, find your safe people. And the constant platitudes that forgiveness brings peace, blah, blah, blah... well, that doesn't apply here. Forgive them if you can, if you can't that's okay. Trust becomes an elusive quality when you grow up with abuse, but once you find decent friends it will build in your psyche. Lift your head and walk away. You are better for that.

I am no contact with my mom because she married the man who molested me. Consequently the No Contact spilled over to my aunts on her side, too. It's hard not to have a relationship with them and sometimes I want to reach out to my cousins especially. Because i don't feel safe around her husband but she won't engage me without him I have to do what is best for me and keep my own safety as my first priority.

It's very difficult, especially at first. Even if you are being hurt by them. But over time it gets easier. If people are repeatedly hurting you and disrespecting you, it's best to sever ties with them unless and until they can prove they've changed.

It is difficult, but sometimes necessary. Setting boundaries with people who treat you poorly can be one of the most difficult things for people who grow up with any sort of abuse or with parents who didn't respect your boundaries, and it is also can be one of the most important self-strengthening tools to use. Yes, you may feel slightly depressed after doing this. You may feel afraid of retaliation, judgment by others, and you may feel obligated to "play nice" with your family and talk yourself out of it. But the reward you will get from learning to set healthy boundaries with people who do not respect you will be far greater than any of these things. If you feel called to go NC with family, please do so and allow yourself the time, resources, people, and space you need to help you heal and become the healthy person that you deserve to be.

It's better than dealing with the negativity they give. But listening to others with normal for families makes you sad. But for me I know I can't go back. There is too much damage done. I'm a better person without family.

It feels so lonely. It is painstakingly difficult to get rid of this feeling and can't seem to snap out of it. Family is people with whom we grew up and people we belong with. But some people are not lucky enough to have one. "No Contact" with your entire family may be an option for someone but not for me, or other people like me. When I feel lonely, I’d go for a walk down town just to watch other people, even if I don't talk to them. I would take a bus to nowhere and back again. It makes me feel less lonely than just sitting at home doing nothing. Life is short, cherish the moments and don't be defeated by our emotion. Who knows what the future may hold ;)

I can't say for my entire family, but going no contact with my father was the best decision I've ever made. I'm not saying this is the case for everyone, but it worked for me. My father was abusive, narcissistic and didn't respect my privacy. Going No Contact is both exhilarating and terrifying. I was already living with my husband and his family at the time, and sent my NC letter through Facebook. I was scared that he would storm over here and demand to speak with me, and yell. He didn't. At several times, he attempted to contact me through my cellphone, but I never responded, and afterwards changed my number. Family members attempted to understand why I wasn't talking to him, or attending family events - some even told me I was overreacting. It's tough, but if you feel that you need to go No Contact with your family, or if you are in danger, I highly recommend it.