I want to see a therapist. How do I tell my parents?
416 Answers
Moderated by Danielle Johnson, MSED, Community mental Health Counseling, LMHC
Updated: Jun 10, 2022
Anonymous
on
Jan 3, 2021
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it's always going to be hard for a parents to hear their child (no matter of you are young, a teenager or even an adult) wants to talk to a therapist, for this communication is the key.
Talk to them in a moment where they are calmed down, you can try to approach one of them first (maybe the one you feel the closest to at the moment), and explain the reasons why you feel like talking to a therapist . Avoid expressions like "I can´t talk to you", "no one ever listens to me here" since it will only increase the possibility of a fight, instead trying explaining your feelings (not necessary the problem if it´s something you don´t want to talk about with them). Try something like "I´ve been feeling overwhelmed for a long time and I don´t know how to cope with it anymore" or "I feel constantly stressed and I could really use some professional advise ". Keep in mind that your parents might feel like they failed you and maybe they will get emotional, this things are normal, just assure them that you think is the best for you at the moment and that it will help you feel better and even improve your relationship with them.
Anonymous
on
Jan 10, 2021
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Be frank. Beating around the bush does not really help. They may offer to listen and be there for you but the way trained therapist can help is way more efficient. Tell them about how you feel and how things have changed. For your parents, you'll still be their little kid. They often fail to notice how things have changed for you and how you may have opinions different from what they have been teaching you over the years. Whatever the outcome you end up with, you would've at least compelled them to think about your mental health and the fact that you need help would be recognized by them.
Anonymous
on
Jan 14, 2021
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Be straightforward with them. Tell them why and make your demand extremely clear to them. Let them know about your feelings and why you need this therapy, this allows them to understand you more. Be prepared for judgement and misunderstanding, and be patient with them. Make sure you approach them politely and respect their decisions, but always remember to stand your ground and get your desire across. Remember that you are extremely courageous for even bringing up this demand, that is a large first step that will go to the betterment of your future. Continue to fight for what you feel is right for you.
Anonymous
on
Feb 28, 2021
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When speaking to my parents on this topic I've learnt to have a very measured approach. Our parents love us and despite their perceived shortcomings, they generally try their best (even when we feel their best wasn't enough.) Parents are hardwired to care when we express that we're having difficulties but they're also human in that they can easily be made to feel as though our hardships are their personal failures.
"I'm having some trouble dealing with life at the moment and feel it would be helpful to speak to an objective professional" has worked for me in the past.
bubblingStrawberry7301
on
Mar 14, 2021
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I can really hear that you have questions about how to go by communicating your need to go and see a therapist. Explaining why you would like to see a therapist to parents can be helpful if you have a good relationship with them. If you do have reservations about telling your parents do reflect on why that is the case. Is it because of cultural stigma? You may have in the past experienced not getting the support you want by sharing with other people. Is it because of gender? Do you fear that by sharing you would be labelled or considered over-reacting? Do you fear the response will reflect toxic positivity? Consideration of how in general you respond to people who have reservations about sharing things with you can be relevant too in understanding your compassion for yourself versus others. Do you apply the rules differently to yourself as opposed to others? Are you hard on yourself about some things but when others open up to you about their insecurities you try your best to make them feel better about themselves? Was there a time you shared something with someone that was met with a negative reception which has held you back from sharing in the future? Ultimately it is down to you to make that decision to choose to be open. Sharing is a choice that cannot be forced by others but must be motivated from within. For further support you can communicate with one of our listeners or therapists on our site. I wish you the best of luck with your journey towards being proud of seeking help.
momollylly
on
Mar 18, 2021
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Seeing a therapist is a good step in achieving better mental health overall. However, telling your parents that you would like one is often daunting. Parents will react differently; some will arrange a first appointment and some might take it as somewhat of a personal attack even when it certainly isn't meant to be. It is important to sit your parents down and let them know that you are being one hundred percent serious in your request. Be sure to specify why you would like to see a therapist to whatever extent you are comfortable with. Saying that seeing a therapist is a lot like seeing a doctor lets your parents know that your mental health is important. Remember that you are entitled to mental healthcare. If they do not allow you to see a therapist, a good place to start would be at, for example, a school psychologist and proceed from there.
beautifulAngel310
on
Apr 8, 2021
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Begin by making sure that you share the news with your parents when they are relatively calm. Then share that you are hoping to grow more in your health/ wellness by speaking to someone that is licensed and skilled to provide help in attaining that goal. It is possible that your parents may be apprehensive or feel angered that you are seeking advice outside of the family or beyond them. If this is the case, allow them to cool off. If you need to speak someone immediately, check and see if there are resources that you can access via school
ArsheeyaFulwani
on
Apr 18, 2021
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It depends on how your relationship with your parents is. Seeking therapy is taboo for some parents, so I understand why it can be hard. You can always begin by speaking to them about how you feel. It may not be easy, however, your parents want the best for you. Let your parents know that seeking a therapist will be helpful for you during this time. Keep the conversation general and stay calm. If they do not seem to understand, remind them of how you feel and how you had the courage to speak to them about it. Let them know that you are reaching out because you trust them and are in need of professional help. Hope this helps !!
friendlyOcean370
on
Apr 22, 2021
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Have a sit down conversation with them. "hey mom/dad, can you sit down for a second? I want to talk with you two about something" and if youre comfortable with it explain some of how youve been feeling. Let them know whats been going on, and bring up how seeing a therapist could help you a lot. When I first brought it up with my mother, I sent her a text because speaking with my voice about feelings is scary to me. If you think that would be better maybe do something like that instead! I think its great that you want to reach out and get that help, I wish you well honey.
Anonymous
on
Apr 28, 2021
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I get how overwhelming it can be to speak to your parents about seeking a therapist considering the stigma that surrounds mental health but the best way to tell them is to just be honest and upfront about how you're feeling and how a therapist might benefit you. Your parents will love you no matter what so even if at first, they don't understand or get angry/disappointed, eventually they'll come around because they want what's best for you. If I were in your place, I would let my parents know about what I'm going through and how I think a therapist is going to help me and give them some space to think through things.
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