How do I talk to my parents when I don't agree with their decisions?

Your parents mostly want what's best for you. But sometimes your perspectives may differ. It is important to understand where they are coming from. You can try to communicate your perspective to them, politely and firmly.

Try to tell them that you're not really fond with their decisions and tell them to consider your own decisions. Tell them this nicely, as many parents like to think they're always right and would think you're trying to rebel against them if you tell them rudely.

This can be really difficult because you often see your parents as being above you on a hierarchy and therefore you are expected to agree with whatever they do. Try to have a calm and mature conversation with them where you can express exactly what your feeling and try to make them understand things from your point of view. It's also important for you to understand why they have made these decisions so communication is really important. Sometimes its okay for you to have completely different opinions to them as long as you are all respectful towards each other. Hopefully if you have this discussion, your parents should take your feelings into account when making decisions future.

I can sense that that you worry about the potential misunderstandings created between yourself and your parents if you share that you disagree with their decisions. Due to a generation gap in thinking young people and parents deviate in how they think, feel and express. Intentions can be good yet sometimes this does not translate into a helpful response. You parents may have you in their best interests. What you need to ask yourself is what is your non-verbal and verbal communication telling them? What is your parent’s verbal and non-verbal communication telling you? You can ask yourself what specific things you are concerned about when it comes to communicating with parents? Put yourself in the shoes of the parent too: If your son or daughter were to tell you about not agreeing with their decisions what would your response be? The world is a place that is changing which is something the young person can share. Honesty and openness in communication is key and if there are hesitancies in how you want to go by communicating with your parent's perhaps you may want to write out a letter. Think about the tone and word choice of the message. How are you coming across in the message? You can also reflect on what you feel is non-verbal communication that is respectful. If wanting further support do not hesitate to communicate with one of our listeners and therapists with lived experience or specialism's in family stress or self-esteem.

Calmly. It's not what you say, but how you say it. Yes, it's true. Regardless of how hasty, or angered they may get, and how quick, please remain calm. I don't know your parents, but I do know that three of you all in a yelling match would never get anything done, and simply doesn't make sense. Sit them down, and calmly approach whatever decision you don't agree with. Explain why you don't agree. Whatever emotions are repercussions may arise from their decisions, just explain it all to them. Explain that you just want them to understand your point of view on the matter. Even include a recommendation. "Mom...Dad...instead of this, why not this instead," and explain how that recommendation is better than their original decision. They may try to interrupt you or even shut you down, because most parents always think they're right but don't give up on the situation. Approach them at different times maybe, different tones, if you realize something isn't working. Best of luck, xoxo.