What are some ways to tell your friends your a self harmer( when they think people do it for attention) ?

If someone thinks you're a self-harmer for attention then explain to them why you do it. Explain how it may be because of emotional pain or because you feel numb or whatever the reason may be. Also let them know you are currently or in the process of seeking help. Also, do research on ways to help yourself, lotions that may help your scars fade and ways to explain self-mutilation to someone. Remember you are stronger than the problems that face you even in your weakest times.

Self harming is a very hard thing to talk about, especially to those who believe people do it for attention. Hopefully they will know that you don't do it for attention but still, there is the worry. Try explaining what you are going through such as depression. However please understand you don't have to reveal anything if you are not comfortable doing so.

In these situations, I simply remember that they are not sources of support and bringing the subject up will likely hurt me in the end. It can be extremely difficult an frustrating to try to discuss a coping mechanism with someone who does not "believe in" it. It may be better for one's own self-care to not disclose to those individuals, and remove oneself from the situation if such a person begins to monologue about attention seekers. They may even take one's input of "I self harm" as validating their viewpoint.

Explain to your friends in a quiet and private location how you are feeling emotionally and what has been on your mind leading up to the self harm before you tell them about the self harming. After they understand what you have felt and or been through explain to them that it has caused you to feel that you had to self harm. Self harm is sought after because of released endorphins while doing it but it is never a good fix,last short,causes scarring,and possible infection. Try finding healthy activities that interest you that may distract you from the bad feelings and thoughts. Always go to someone and tell them how you are feeling and acquire helpful and healthy resources such as guides, activity and distraction ideas that are safe and healthy and people who you can vent and talk to that are understanding of what your going through. There are always people who are available to talk to such as Listeners on 7Cups and people whom HAVE been where you are emotionally and or physically.

You may want to explain your situation entirely before telling them that you self harm, for instance describe your depression or anxiety and how it affects you beforehand.

Self harm is often used not for attention seeking but to deal with emotional pain. You feel you control something in your life and cause yourself to feel something other than what is truly causing your pain (emotion/spiritual). If your friends are close friends, you may have already shared some of your past life experience- possibly the start of a very painful part of your life. I would start with describing a brief description of the event that occurred in your life and how that made you feel. Was this a time you felt you couldn't control the situation? The self harm behavior is a way you felt you could control something in your life. You don't do it because you want attention- in fact you probably don't want anyone to notice this behavior because of the attention it causes. But being that you are telling people about this behavior, you may get a reaction of surprise, fear, sadness, or anger and this could lead to a path to where you can seek help to deal with these past life experiences and stop self harm.

If it important to inform your good friends perhaps you could ask them as a favor to you to discuss some explanatory article or handout on the condition (that you would select and provide to them) before sharing the details of your condition. Perhaps you might even consider discussing the contents of the article with them before making your revelation.

If you're good with writing, I'd suggest writing short notes/letters to each friend and going into enough detail about your situation that they know you're not someone using it for attention, but not too far where you feel too exposed. I never used this method myself, but two close friends I had did and they said it made the process far easier for them, and it helped us as friends understand that they were engaging in the action because of intense pain; not to "look cool". That'd be my best recommendation.

I would say honestly, and, to look them in the eye, and be serious about it. Before you make a revelation, have a goal in mind of what you want from the interaction. If you don't want attention or for the favor, what can your friends do to help? Can you make it specific to each friend, and can each of them help you in a unique way?

I think people that have not experienced what is like sadly can not understand. I think it is important to tell people who you think will listen to you and take you seriously. Have you tried a good counsellor or psychologist. All self-harm matters, however you present (even though I fully believe you!).