I am struggling with codependency and depression. I cannot afford therapy. What can I do to get help?

You can join a free support group. Codependency is often grounded in the lack of external relationships which makes it hard to place and enforce boundaries, but once you have good solid relationships that are not abusive you start gaining that power back rapidly. Once out of the relationship, you can use more time and energy to heal, grow, and even get the means for therapy. But joining a group can be itself therapeutic. You can also read, watch videos, and educate yourself about abuse, relationships, boundaries, and basic psychology, which can help you help yourself. Journaling can also help. Sharing your story, helping others, can be healing.

Codependency can often be the source of depression, because we find that we rely on others in order to make us happy. Coping with it on your own can also be difficult, but it is also fundamental in order to gain the skills to take forward with you through life. Being independent and being able to be okay on your own is the most important step to take that goes away from the codependent nature. It'll also allow you to find sources of happiness on your own rather than finding it from others. The small kindnesses you show yourself will help in the long run.

hello, im sorry to hear that. Have you ever considered getting a pet ? I heard that pets can make adrenaline boosts in a persons hormones. Or if you dont like pets try doing therapeutic things for the soul such as art therapy. No need to go to ACTUAL therapy, but the idea of drawing or expressing through art is a good idea to help remove some depression or help you find words. Also, if you're not a person who likes art, try reading. I have been reading so many cool books that help me escape from reality and put me in this cloud of dreams and fictional situations. So basically when someone asks me what my happy place is, I would think of a book that I have read recently and go to my happy place, which in this case is the book. I hope this helps, if you even consider reading, message me and I can put you on some real good reads that won't waste your time and are also fun art the same time.

I definitely get how hard it is to balance relationships while your depression is bad! If you want more help with this, try consulting local mental health resources, or talking to your support network to define boundaries and/or get help! Many cities have some lead on therapeutic resources that are either free or discounted heavily! If you're in school, a school counselor is perfect for this type of thing! It is also important to keep your support system in the loop, for both your health and theirs. They can figure out how to best support you while also setting boundaries for themselves.

Start by setting interpersonal boundaries. That is the most powerful tool you can begin with. Stop oversharing with other people if you find yourself doing that; keep some aspects of your life to yourself. Codependency is a way to control over people indirectly: ask yourself why you're trying to control others. Are they trying to control you? Do you lack autonomy in your life? If so, figure out ways to gain real autonomy. Determine, for example, a plan to achieve financial independence if you have not already. Limit interactions with other toxic or codependent people in your life, if they exist. Identify things that you like/enjoy in life that other people do not enjoy or like. It is ok to be different; to be yourself; and to disagree to with other people. Remember that disagreement is the embodiment of kindness and morality if it is honesty: it is a way to give other people more information about where you stand, thus honoring their ability to be human decision-makers, possibly capable of even rejecting you. Be ok with rejection as well, especially if toxic people try to reject you for being honest. Moving beyond codependency takes lots of work, failure, and practice. It will be hard. Keep pushing forward!

You have already taken a step to get help by coming here! Sometimes it's easy to become overwhelmed. Have you tried breaking it down into more manageable bits? You already have a victory by being here. Would you like to try building on that? Don't discount the small victories because they eventually add up. And the more you keep going, the more confident you will become. Have you tried any of the resources here? Or looked at them to see what's available that might be related to what you are feeling right now? Sometimes you have to explore and it's trial and error until you find that special something that 'clicks' for you and really opens up your perspective. I would be happy to chat more with you after you have tried some of these things if you wish. Or there are lots of other listeners you can chat with. We all want the same thing: to connect and make a positive difference, to help in whatever way we can.