How to forgive yourself for hurting someone?

Self-compassion is so important. I've fallen in guilt traps for years at a time. A simple thing I do that helps is to speak to myself as if I was speaking to a friend - this keeps me from being too harsh and gives me the freedom to treat myself kindly.

Apologize. It's really that simple, and if they accept your apology, it will make it that much easier to forgive yourself. If they don't forgive you, then you just have to realize that you've done all you can, and it's only them who is holding on. Just because they won't let go doesn't mean you shouldn't.

If you've said sorry and genuinely mean it and are kind to them, know that you've done all you can to make it up to that person.

Asking for forgiveness is really the only way to begin to forgive yourself. If the other person won't accept your apology, you must move on.

The first step is to earn forgiveness from them. Apologize, even if that means sitting down and talking to them about it. If you don't do that, then you'll feel bad about it for a very long time. After that's done, you can finally forgive yourself, and it will be a lot easier to do so.

I try to make up for what I did. Even if it was with good intentions. Talk to the person you hurt and see what you can do to better the situation.

Make sure they know you regret it (even if it's accidentally burning someone's hand with a hot plate!), and think if you would forgive someone who did it to you

Think back to the last time somebody apologized to you about something. Did you forgive them? There is a very good chance that you did. Now think back to the last time you harmed someone else. Have you forgiven yourself? Probably not. We all make mistakes. Oftentimes, through our actions, somebody gets hurt.You can do something wrong while still being a good person. A lot of guilt or shame can make you feel like there is something wrong with you. Realize, right now, that there is a very big difference between doing a bad thing and being a bad person. Even when you do something that you regret, you most likely had a valid reason for doing it at the time (even if that reason doesn’t make rational sense). You didn’t do something bad because you are a fundamentally bad person; there was an intent, or valid motivation, behind your action. Know that despite your flaws, you are okay as you are. Your flaws, rather than making you “less” of a person, are what make you who you are. What you think of as a defect actually makes you far more interesting to others. You are not perfect. You make mistakes. But you are also on a path of growth. Your mistakes and failures help you improve. As flawed as you may be, you must accept yourself, flaws and all, if you are to make progress in your life.

You can be very upset and this shouldn't affect your life. Everybody hurts others. This is normal and it happens if you want it or not. You should don't give up and try to make this person happy. If you understand that it is normal, you will not be so sad and angry to yourself

I don't think there is any question that forgiving yourself rises from receiving forgiveness from the person you hurt. If they grant that forgiveness, you can move on more easily. If they don't forgive you, at least you did the most you could do - you opened yourself to another and said sorry.