How do I keep myself from getting to attached to people?

I keep myself from getting to attached to people because I have been hurt so many times in life. I have come to the conclusion that we are all human and we all make mistakes. But if I focus on myself and how I relate to others, I don't get concerned about getting attached to them. I only concern myself with getting to know them.

Attachement is not something negative, but what you do with it can affect you. Try to find activities which you enjoy on your own, love yourself, and this way the people you get attached to will not feel like the only means to happiness.

Try to reflect on what you have earned when you were with them. If they gave you anything else but hurt and blue, then you have to speak to yourself to stay strong and move on. Life is too short to hurt yourself continuously. In the beginning you might have problems facing that, but in the end doing the right never sends you to the wrong road.

Sweetie, I know this is tough. The more time we spend with something or someone they/those things the more they become integral part of us. We start missing them when they aren't around. Well, I never thought that today I wouldn't be in touch with my high school bestie. Times change. People get differently customised. Their priorities change. Nothing is eternal. We get too inclined. It sometimes happens naturally but we can't help it too. It's okay. But know one thing that we can't control others or their emotions. So we have to mend ourselves. Work on it. Ask me how? Practice detachment and zero expectations. Detachment doesn't necessarily mean isolation. It is just that you shouldn't affected by the happenings.

Learn to love and accept ourselves for what we are and see our good sides, build up self-confidence and trust in our own capabilities so we do need to look for constant reassurance with others.

For me and my experiences, there really isn’t a way. Your heart feels what it wants to feel. You feel good when others treat you well. You feel bad when they do t. When someone treats you like how you want to be treated, you grow attached. Your heart “feels” for them. My solution would be to not get so involved. If you feel like your getting attached to someone, distance yourself. It may hurt the other person, but....if it’s what’s best.

I’ve found that the best way to keep from getting attached to people is to set strict boundaries and make sure to stick to them. It’s not easy sometimes, but I find that when I do stick to those boundaries I don’t seem to get attached and can easily keep my distance. I use this mostly for when I’m at work and have to keep a distance from my clients. I’m not sure what you will be using it for but I think setting those boundaries can work in any situation really. Here’s hoping this can help you.

Getting attached to someone is a relatively normal course of action. When two people click well and spend time constantly with each other, it's natural to grow attached to them. What you can do, however, is keep your mind open to the fact that there's a possibility of anything happening, that people come and go naturally. It is important to not take it personally if someone left you; for most of the time it isn't your fault, but the other person's current situation or their own thoughts that lead to such. Fear of attachment is usually linked to your expectation of the other person to stay. It is important to keep in mind that people are free to come and go as they please, whether they leave you in the dark or tell you their reasonings outright. In such cases, make it a point to look at the bigger picture. Is it really your fault, or are you just blaming yourself to justify their actions? Sometimes people leave because they themselves aren't sure what to do, and in such cases, we can only give them the benefit of doubt, then find the strength in ourselves to move on with our own lives. Wishing you all the love.

This is really though. And I confess I've been there myself and it's been to people who are ultimately not really worth my attention and effort. What helped me getting through was cutting contact with those people who didn't reciprocate my feelings, or if not possible, talking less and less to them. Attachment styles are learned at a young age and might depend on different factors. It's fine to get a little attached to people. Only take notice if they are really worth it.Do they give you the needed attention, love, care? If not, look for people who do. There are many of us out there. It's ultimately your happiness and well-being that matters.

Do you feel like you have a pattern of uncontrollable dependency on people? How do you define "getting too attached"? In many regards, becoming attached to a person is a natural process, whether that person is family, friend, or love, as proof of mutual bonding over a long period of time or powerful incident. However, if you feel a sense of anxiety, loss, depression, self-insecurity, anger, frustration, or guilt from being apart from a person in normal day-to-day circumstances, you may have formed an unhealthy dependency. That's okay - what's really important is that you are trying to figure it out now and asking these questions. When we become dependent on someone, it may be because we are seeking validation from outside sources - and feel we are not validated when we are without those source. That could be a sign that we aren't validating ourselves enough - we aren't our own best friend yet, we aren't actively supporting ourselves, or we don't trust our own opinions. This could be occuring even within someone who is an extrovert or very confident in themselves. Think about the reasons why you think you need other people to be happy. Think about what is missing emotionally when people are around, and if there is anyway you can provide that to yourself. In the meantime, you can try to slighlty change your social patterns to see if mixing things up can help you shake your dependencies. Alternatively, if someone is accusing you of becoming attached and you are confused by this accusation, it may be that the acuser is uncomfortable in some way and having trouble communicating that and so they are lashing out. Ultimately, only you know if you are (a) truly becoming dependent on people in unhealthy ways, (b) why you feel you need that, and (c) what you can do to change those patterns. Good luck!