Why can't I seem to get past the words they told me, even years later?

Probably because you're still hanging on to them. You let them run through your head long enough to let it affect you years later. Try starting a new page with yourself, and loving the worst parts of you.

It is because we remember them and overtime those moments and thoughts can turn into reality which is hard to change once in that spot.

Because you care about what other people say more than your own, which you shouldn't. Trust Yourself

In short, words hurt. Insults are meant to target you where you are the most vulnerable, resulting in trauma. You are often left to wonder why you were the target, and most of the time, the person who is bullying has insecurities of their own that they do not know how to cope with.

Words are powerful. Sometimes we think we have gotten over it but something might remind us, and it's like we're hearing those words again for the first time.

Humans tend to focus on the negative, so whenever something bad happens usually that is the memory that sticks with us over the positive ones. Also sometimes when things happen we can hold onto them thinking "Oh my god I can't believe they said that to me". It's just how the brain it. We hold onto things in order to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future.

We all have gone through that stuff at least once in our life but it is up to us whether or not we are going to use those words to do better, to outgrow our current versions, and to be a constant improvement, We shouldn't let those words define who we are as a person.

Words can leave scars and that's unfortunate. I hope you would get the empowerment you need to move forward from this.

I know this feeling, Sometimes when you’re in a relationship you have a hard time letting go of old feelings and arguments. It is easier for some people to hold onto those bad feelings to somehow make up for how they’re currently feeling. It can be extremely frustrating and it can feel like you are still hurt from what was sad so long ago. Maybe the argument never got closure from so long ago and you are seeking that closure. Do you feel like you feel comfortable bringing up those concerns to them to see if you can find a solution?

There are times when I can't let go of words people have said to me. What they said hurt so badly, their words made me over think, their words made me overly upset, their words made me angry, etc etc. I seem to, more often than not, internalize what was said and deal with it myself. That would be the root of my issues; try and deal with it all by myself. That is the great thing about this site. You have listeners to talk to so you don't have to internalize anything. Get the perspective of someone random. Get a totally new and interesting perspective on what is bothering you or what you are harmfully internalizing your self with.