Why is it that I can't get over someone who's been cruel to me for no reason whatsoever, just because they were very kind to me before?

I know where you are coming from, as I went through the same thing. I feel the best answer for this is that even though we know the person was cruel, there was something there that we loved and we don't really feel like letting that go.

I would say it is because that person was a part of your life and sometimes the memories are difficult to let go of. It is not like we can just forget someone that had an influence on our life in a snap-of-a-finger. It is perfectly normal to feel the way you do. You need some time.

Initial stage is just like a honeymoon....excitement of getting to know eachother....then it becomes a habit and a routine....when confronted they start eluding and become uncaring and cruel

Your focusing on how this person was kind to you instead of reminding yourself how they made you feel

It might be that you focus on that person too much in your daily life, or maybe you placed too much importance on the person in your life to begin with. People let us down because we are human. We let others down as well. Maybe try to not place too much stock into one person being good to you and be good to yourself. Sometimes others need time away from us to appreciate us. If they never do, then they never belonged in our life to begin with.

We all want to hold on to the kindness they used to have. Sometimes it's easier to hold on to what was good rather than actually seeing what is really bad. We want to see the good in people rather than accepting the bad. It's just easier that way.

Could it be that you are holding on to a small chance that they will wake up to be as kind as they once were? you are at a stand still waiting on them to change back and afraid that immediately you take a step forward they will be as kind as they were. Allow yourself to not get stack in your journey towards getting over them.

While we experience relationships, our bodies release chemicals that can attach us to those who we chose to get attached to. It is up to you to destroy those chemicals that are keeping you from letting go.

When we're angry with a person, we want to simplify the situation into good vs bad. When someone has been kind to you, that becomes difficult, which causes us to continue questioning the situation. A person who has hurt you isn't always a terrible person in general. Often a day will come when they regret the pain they caused you and will try to become better because of it. Try to use your pain to become better, kinder, more willing to listen and to understand.

Maybe the duplicity hurts more than the actual action? That could be. Sometimes we blame ourselves for not seeing through the veneer? I hope you find peace!