Why is it so hard to talk to an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend?

I think it will depend where things were left off at. Did you end on a bad or good note? Was there a lot of pain in that relationship? Do you still have feelings for that person? There can be a number of things that can be holding one back from communicating with an ex lover. Depending on the situation its never easy, especially if you want to be back with that person, sometimes its best to avoid so those feelings that you feel may come back. Regardless, with growth you should be able to have closure and give yourself that

The feelings are still there so having a conversation with an ex will always be difficult while feelings are still there. In most situations, it is hard for both parties to deal with conversing with an ex but is even harder when one party cares about the other one more. It is also difficult knowing that the ex may have moved on or found someone else. Your mind overthinks a lot when talking to someone you used to date and so there are plenty of reasons to overthink or get nervous and not know what to say when talking to your ex.

There can be many reasons why it's hard to talk to an ex and since there is history with your relationship which can be good, bad, or both can make it harder should it be bad history. Unresolved feelings linger and may arise when you talk to them. Maybe you just don't know what to say because it feels really awkward at the moment. Sending an email might be easier to break the ice and allow you to think about what it is that you want to say. But the best thing to do is, ask yourself "Why do I want to talk to my ex?'' "What do I want to talk to them about?" When you answer these questions it will be easier to reach out.

Personally, I feel it is so hard to talk to an ex-partner because of how the relationship ended. If the relationship ended on a positive note, it's probably easier to talk with them. If the relationship ended badly, it's probably harder to talk with them. Also just the fact that you two were so close on an emotional level and suddenly ended is what makes it harder to talk to them later on as just a regular person and no longer your partner. Because I had a toxic relationship, I personally do not ever want to talk to my ex again, and if I did, I know it would be extremely difficult.

There are a lot of reasons why it might be hard to reconnect or talk with exes. At one point there was a lot of emotions in the relationship. A romantic relationship and a friendship have a lot of different expectations and emotionally connections. This can make it very hard to transition between the two. There are a lot of feeling involved in this and sometimes one person has some feelings that the other person doesn't. This can make it awkward or difficult to talk to the person without remembering the emotions. It can also just be plain awkward because of previous events.

Sometimes, getting overwhelmed with emotions creates hesitation, the number of emotions we have at that time makes things harder, especially if it's after a bad experience. Anger, frustration, confusion, excitement, sadness yet happiness all at the same time. You don't know what to expect, will they be friendly? Are they considering coming back? Are they going to talk about stories from the past? Or did they even forget everything and went on their own way? It's hard to deal with all of these emotions at once, which makes it generally so hard to talk to an ex–boyfriend or an ex–girlfriend.

being with some in most cases means sharing with them more than you would with someone who is just your friend and as a result the longer your relationship is the more the other person gets to know you and in some cases they might end up knowing you better than anyone else in your life. you share with them every detail with them but whats interesting about relationships is that contrary to normal friendships that end more gradually, you drift apart, you get accustomed to it etc, these end abruptly and so the person who knew everything about you, you stop talking to. they end up walking around with all your secrets but act like you're strangers. so it's so hard talking to an ex because of your history.